Frustrated-Need Guidance

Was the land a gift to YOU or to both of you? If it is to YOU then he has no say whatsoever, it is not marital property. I’d go ahead and get a seperation agreement (spelling out his promises, if you do not have one). What are you giving in on? Is it worth the fight? Technically all marital property/debt in NC is split 50/50.Do you have kids together? Child support is seperate from property division. Talk to an attorney about your specific case, he/she should be able to help you protect yourself. But the best thing is to get everything in writing.

In my opinion, you need to gather all the information you can on your property and finacial situation, the phone calls and the fact that your stbx’s girlfriend is pregnant while you are still legally his wife, and consult with an attorney. You need to get on the offensive, and yes, quit living in fear. He abandoned you. He is commiting adultery. She could be sued for alienation of affection. I’m not sure what proof would be needed but I believe that the fact that when he left you he moved in with her would be proof enough that there was some sort of relationship prior to separation.
Yes, if the land was given to both of you technically, it should be divided as marital property. But as I said, to me, he is the one that should be worried and a good attorney will take advantage of the fact that he abandoned you for another woman. And that he has been threatening you with the loss of your home and legal action to get you to “give in” to his demands is something that a lot of attorney’s would have a field day with…Consult an attorney…please.

The marital property you have accumulated would be divided equally between you. If he had left the property and has no desire to keep it, there is no reason the court would not allow you to keep it. However, you may be required to refinance it out of his name or give him one half of the equity in the residence. If you want some more general information, you should read the information available on our website regarding Equitable Distribution, or you could also attend one of our free seminars.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax

Charlotte Office
301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Phone: (704)307.4600
Main Fax: (704) 9343.0044

Durham & Chapel Hill Office
1829 East Franklin Street
Building 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
(919) 321.0780


The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.

I am frustrated with my estranged husband! Without an inkling he was going to leave, He walked out on me about 7 months ago and moved in with another woman. I cannot prove he was having a relationship with her sexually before he left, but I can prove phone calls and the fact she got pregnant 2 weeks after he left me.

Now, we had joint property, the marital home and an acre of land my mother and father gave us as a gift. When he left he told me that I could have everything. Now when he gets mad with me, him and his girlfriend try to hold this over my head. They said I should be thankful that he isn’t going to go after the home and land. They try to use it as leverage. I am scared that I will lose my mother and father’s land they gave me so 9 times out of 10 i will give in. Now I am asking, should I be scared about losing this piece of property and my home. I was always faithful and true to my husband and now I’m scared that he’s going to take everything away from me. He’s already taken my confidence and self esteem. Can he take my home now? I need to quit living in fear.