A husband and wife each have a fiduciary duty to the other to disclose all financial information in a divorce. If your spouse refuses to voluntarily provide his/her financial information, statements, etc. for a separation agreement, then you will have to file a court action for equitable distribution against him/her assuming you have already separated. Once a court action is filed, depending on your county, there may be local rules that require a disclosure of the information. If not, and/or if you need more information than the initial disclosures, you can serve your spouse with discovery requests (interrogatories, request for production of documents, etc.).
Charges made on credit cards after the date of separation are the separate debt of the spouse making the charges. Therefore, they are not included in equitable distribution.
There is no form for alimony but to formally request it, you would have to file a court complaint for alimony. If you make more than your spouse, you are likely the supporting spouse and he/she is likely the dependent spouse. So you would not be able to receive alimony from your spouse but you may be able to prevent your spouse getting alimony from you depending on the strength of your evidence of infidelity.
Marital debt, which is subject to being divided in equitable distribution, is debt accrued during the marriage for a marital purpose. If you were not aware of the existence of the debt, you may have an argument to avoid being responsible for it but it could depend on whether you received the benefit of the debt/charges on the credit card.
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