How is alimony decided?

Dear Confused:

Run, do not walk, to an attorney’s office. Please note that I say this with all due respect. It sounds to me like your husband does not, and did not, have any idea of how hard a stay at home mother works. She is a tax driver, dry cleaner, event organizer, event planner, chef, nurse, etc. You were a value to your husband throughout the marriage and you are entitled to alimony. Do not sit on this right.

Before I could give you ideas on numbers, I would need to meet with you, go over all expenses, your standard of living during the marriage, and what has happened since the date of separation. Do not make it easy for him, as I am sure that it has not been easy for you over the past year. Best of luck.

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney at Law
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 200
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

My husband and I have been married for 14 years, the last one in seperate homes. I have a degree in nursing but I have not carried a license for almost 3 years because we both wanted me to be a stay at home mother to our 3 children(11,10 and 9 years old). He is a physician making 350,000.00+ per year. He has admitted to an affair during our seperation with a nurse at the hospital where he works. He has already told me he wants me to get a job so that I will be able to take care of myself and that he has no intention of paying me alimony. I can get my nursing license back but should I? Should I look for a job although I do not feel it is in our children’s best interest for me to do that? Roughly, how much alimony would he have to pay if any? How long would he pay? If I were to work would that hurt my chances for alimony? If I sue the nurse for criminal conversation what is the likelihood I would win? He has admitted guilt. What type of award is usually given? I know I sound money hungry in this posting but I given up my life, time with my family, my career, and many friends for him over the years. In return, he has been verbally and emotionally abusive to me and our children(witnesses willing to testify to that if necessary). He wants me to make it easy for him during this and for once I plan to make him miserable by being more difficult than he ever imagined I could do.
Thank you!