In Tears: How to Cancel Court Order Visitation

You are not legally bound to take your visitations. No he can not be held in contempt. It is a choice to take visitations.
If there is that much drama with the mother then be thankful that you have a small amount of contact with her compared to the child who is with her primarily all the time. My suggestion to you, from experience, is not to give up! Let her fuss, let her pick at details. There is nothing saying that you or your husband have to listen to it or take any of it to heart. If you are worried about physical violence, then it may be a good idea to have the meeting to pick the child up at a police station. Do not speak to her more than necessary during this. This is NOT about her. It’s about the child. Don’t let her provoke either of you into an arguement. Take the visitations for the childs sake. How badly might that child NEED to see what a “normal” home is like? Even if it’s for a short period of time. Follow the court order to the letter and let her fuss. If she was not letting him have visitations before and is being forced to now…you stop visitations because she pitches a fit every time…she wins. You’ve spent all that time, effort and money for nothing. Stopping visitations will not benefit the child and that is what visitations are about. I understand, probably better than some, how emotionally disturbing a hostile ex can be towards everyone involved, but I also know that the children NEED at least one parent that is emotionally stable. Just my opinion though…

I’m sorry to hear it sounds like the two of you are going through such a difficult time.

Can the two of you go to some family counseling before deciding you do not want to have visitation with his children? People who make that decision while they are in an emotional state often regret it in the future.

The court will not force you to take your visitation.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax


The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

Back at the keyboard again. We are both in tears. Just when we thought our situation was getting better - guess what - it’s getting worse. So much so, that my husband and I fear that someone will get hurt or in serious trouble.

My husband and I filed all the paperwork and spent the thousands of dollars in lawyer fees, court costs to file for visitation, and contempt of court papers against the mother after the order was established. Our biggest portion of visitation takes place during the summer. She’s in GA and we are in NC. Every year, it’s the same drama. Whenever babymama doesn’t get her way she picks at every detail and becomes so aggrevating that now we are at wits end. My husband who has fought so hard to be apart of our little ones life is now throwing up his hands and saying the H with it. We are all cried out, financially strained, and emotionally tired of the constant drama we are facing just to have visitation.

My question:
Since my husband was the one who pushed to have the order drawn, how do we cancel it?

If he just stops with his visitation, what are the consequences? Can he be held in contempt?

All cried out and at wits end…Aggrevated to death…