In which order do actions happen in a separation/divorce?

Living under same roof with husband but getting ready to separate. (he has a girlfriend).
Do we do equitable distrubution first and then PSS and when can I go for alimony? Been married 23 years. I dont understand in what order these actions are suppose to happen or can they all be done at one time in court?
I’m getting an uneasy feeling that my husband might skip town and move 1,000 miles away to where he is from. If he runs what can I do to get alimony? He has made statements about running if he has to pay alimony to me for years. I’m on disability by the way. Thanks.

You must live in a separate residence for one year and one day in North Carolina before filing divorce. You need to begin the equity distributon process that includes property, investments, debt and alimony. You should contact an attorney or mediator to help start the process. Depending on your ability to communicate, you may be able to avoid costly litigation.

John Morgan
Divorce Mediation of the Carolinas

Please note the previous contributor has no affiliation with our firm.

I would begin making attempts to negotiate with your spouse on these issues. More often than not, spouses are able to reach an out-of-court agreement, and can incorporate those terms in a separation agreement.

If you are unable to reach an agreement on the terms of equitable distribution or spousal support, once you separate you can take immediate action by filing a lawsuit for both. You do not need to, and should not, wait until you have been separated for a year in order to bring these claims. You’ll need to adhere to the local rules in your county with regard to scheduling the hearings, but you are entitled to have a hearing for post-separation support fairly quickly after you file.

If he runs, you still have the ability to bring your suits for spousal support and alimony. You will need to serve him with the lawsuit, which may present some difficulties, but you certainly have the ability to institute legal action even though he moves to another state.