Is this enough proof?


#1

By logging into a shared cell phone account, I am able to read text messages in real time. I have read and saved texts from my husband to someone else, regarding a girl (by name) visiting him (at the home he has stayed in since leaving me) and asking his family to keep quiet about it. This happens to be the same girl in which he was texting on a daily basis a couple of years ago.
Keep in mind, since he left, we’ve been in constant contact by phone and in person, and often discussed reconciliation. So there was no clear expectation of divorce.

Is this enough proof to alter an alimony case? I have also been told by an attorney that I could also have a legal proposal written up and present it to my husband, along with the texts, to negotiate a divorce agreement out of court. Is this true? Is this enough ‘proof’ should we end up in court?


#2

I should also note, it will be enough proof to him, but I was talking about from a legal aspect. So he will probably be agreeable to a proposal once I show him, but I wanted to know what strength they have in court.


#3

** Not a Lawyer**

I may not be following your question, it sounds like you are strongly hinting he had an affair. Even if he had an affair, it would not affect your alimony I do not think. If YOU had an affair, it would bar you from receiving alimony if proven, but aside from looking bad to a judge, to my knowledge, only the dependent spouse committing adultery is a bar to alimony. The supporting spouse can have an affair, and will still have to pay alimony. Now, guilt from having it proven might get them to agree to pay more, or longer, but I don’t know if it will legally have an effect in what they are ordered to pay.


#4

Yes, I’m saying he had the affair. I’ve been waiting, like an idiot, for 7 months. In this case, I would be considered the dependent spouse, since he makes considerably more than I do.


#5

The attorney is correct. You can use the evidence in an attempt to get a better settlement out of him than you would get otherwise. If he is the supporting spouse, he has some exposure to alimony, but the affair could go to length and duration. The threat of an alienation of affections claim can also help you in settlement.