I am the custodial parent and we have a court order on custody and visitation.
Decretal section on visitation clearly says that Ex must pick up children every other Friday at 6 pm at my home, it further states that if more than 1 hour late visit is forfeited with no makeup unless we both agree on any time change.
The Order allows options for either party to designate another competant person known to the parties who is licensed to drive, to pick up kids in case the parent cannot pick up.
It also is clear that any visitation in addition to what is decreed may be done if both parties agree and put in writing with each having a copy
BUT…it further states that ultimately I have sole discretion on whether or not to grant any additional visitaion.
Ex typically sends a family member to get the kids at 6 because she has changed work schedule fairly often .
Problem : Ex now refuses to send a family member ( says they dont like being in traffic at 6 pm) and insists that I allow her to pick kids up 2 1/2 hours later at 8:30 pm on Friday. I have accomodated this several times but told her it would be on a case by case basis, as she then drives the kids 2 hours ( they are 6 & 9) to where she lives .Kids are asleep when ex comes at 8:30, then have to wake, get in a car , drive 2 hours, arrive at 10:30 pm to be awakened only to go into the house to go back to sleep ?? Then ex goes to work Saturday .
I have offered for Ex to get kids Saturday morning at 8 am, or after she gets off work Saturday afternoon, but she insists on 8:30 pm only Fridays.
Ex is supposed to get kids this coming Tuesday night at 6 for thanksgiving , and now insists on coming at 8:30 on Tuesday ( 2 1/2 hours later than the Order).
I expressed that she needs to adjust work schedule, trade days off, or get a family member to get kids on time at 6 pm , as I am willing to accomodate if there is an emergency, but not to allow her to " De Facto" modify visitation everytime she chooses a new work schedule.
Ex is insisting that if I don’t cooperate she will file a motion to modify custody/visitation.She further insists she will show up at my home at 8:30 and that I better let her take the kids !! I am concerned she will start drama as well.
What is your opinion of how this is best handled, as I cannot see any change in circumstance that would allow her any modification, in fact without my written agreement to any pickup time changing from 6 pm ( remember she has a 1 hour leeway to be late) than if she does come at 8:30 she could be in contempt…is this correct ?