Child support and custody/visitation are two seperate things. You should immediately contact your DSS office, division of child support for advice and you can run the child support calculator on this site.
Dear The Mommy:
Greetings. You are legally separated on the date that you start to live separate and apart.
Your husband cannot get alimony from you when he is cohabitating with a member of the opposite sex. He has effectively waived alimony.
Yes, the biggest tip I can tell you is to IMMEDIATELY go to the child support enforcement agency, or retain an attorney, and file NOW. Do not wait any longer. Stop being bullied. He is not going to take your child away and if he does, the court would give her back to you - given the facts you stated herein.
You may be able to have your husband take a drug test, but likely not the girlfriend. Thank you.
Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax
301 McCullough Drive Suite 510
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax
1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax
The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.
I’m finally safely able to file for child support. DH and I have been apart for 1 yr and 2 mo., but not legally separated (I pd $700 for that to get drawn up, and he never agreed to it).
We just closed on our house yesterday. He was threatening not to agree to sell, if I filed for child support. I stayed quiet until I had the house ready & on the market & sold ($3000 out of my own and parent’s pocket to fix up that he is refusing to pay 1/2 of).
I need his support financially for our 33 month old. She is with me entirely, I pay all of her childcare & medical. he pays nothing. He only gave us a total of about $3000 when I first asked him to move out (only b/c he thought we might get back together), and only $20 since then in a period of a year. I’m fed up.
He is living with a girlfriend now, and her 3 young sons.
I was at first worried about that he might try to go after alimony from me, b/c he never held a job, spent money before we had it, and racked up $49K of unsecured debt in 7 years, and left me with the bill refusing to pay anything on his own.
Enough being “nice & quiet”.
I’m not going to file bankruptcy, and let him continue to ruin our future by his inability to be responsible.
Are there any tips for me, before I try to ask for Child Support?
I’m still a bit intimidated, b/c he will threaten to try to take my daughter from me (whom he doesn’t ask to see or visit, and when I take her to his mothers to visit 70 miles away, he only stays for an hour, and he’s had his “quality” time).
I was wondering, too, if anyone knows if you can make it a condition of visitation, if we ever get to that, that he and his girlfriend submit to a drug test before they take her. I don’t want him having anything to do with her if I don’t know whether or not he’s clean (he’s a recovering alcoholic, and tried to hide smoking pot off and on for the whole marriage).
Any suggestions, tips, hints?