For years my husband and I have been dealing with a very unfair situation. He is currently ordered to pay child support for two children. One of them we know for sure is NOT biologically his and the other might not be either. His ex and the kids reside in NC. To sum up the situation- when he was younger he got entangled with this bipolar woman…when she claimed she was pregnant with his child, he married her and then he found out later she was sleeping with many other men. He left her when he found this out and she fled to NC. Unbeknownst to him she was pregnant again. Child support for the 1st child was part of the divorce- which took place in WA. Then when she applied for welfare, they slammed him with an administrative order for the 2nd child- a child he did not know about and even though he expressed his doubts about paternity, they denied him the right to a paternity test. Years later his ex came out and admitted spitefully that she knows the child is not his but that my husband will “pay anyway.” In fact, she knows the real dad’s full name and location but refuses to disclose it. My husband has hired many attorneys and we have been fighting this situation for years but so far we have gotten no help. She steals our money and spends it on drugs. My husband has never been in these children’s lives- they are just a horrible legal and financial burden. While he was initially interested in dealing with the first child, she threatened to kill both him and the child. She now has a criminal record and untreated mental problems- we know she was not kidding. My husband has since moved on with his life and now we want peace and to be able to pay our bills. She has remarried and while her husband talked of adopting the kids- she will not consent because she enjoys collecting our money. We thought maybe she’d eventually consent but it seems that will never happen- she told us we’d have to pay her a huge lump sum in exchange for her consent. Things are currently the worst they have ever been. My husband lost his job and they are garnishing his unemployment. We can barely survive and this woman is taking a huge chunk for her kids- at least one of which is NOT his. At first they were taking a smaller amount and now this week, the amount taken has suddenly doubled. We cannot even have it be reduced because we pay less than what the calculator says- we couldn’t afford to pay the support when he was working, now we are doomed! We have two legitimate children who are suffering as the result of this woman’s fraud. My kids deserve their father’s income. They deserve equal protection. He should not be forced to pay for kids that are not biologically his to the economic detriment of his real children. Despite being told over and over that there is “nothing we can do”, I still believe there has got to be a solution here. This is a complete perversion of justice and I need someone to please give me some sort of advice. I really appreciate it. I feel so hopeless. Despite the fact that he was married to her (which he did under duress), despite the fact that it has been many years since the divorce, there has got to be a way to convince the court to admit DNA and free him of support for the child(ren) that are not his. Please help!
North Carolina law presumes that a child born to persons who are married is the biological child of the husband. From the facts you give, it also appears that these children have both been judicially determined to be the children of your husband. Your husband therefore has an obligation to support these children according to the laws in North Carolina.
I do think you may have a chance to have the support reduced based on your husband’s current circumstances, also, the two children you have together should be accounted for in any recalculation of support, meaning that your husband’s income will be reduced by his obligation to the children living with him before the calculation is done.
So NC law supports paternity fraud and denies men due process? And we just state this matter of factly, like it is okay?
Forget the the fact that this is all a huge violation of the Constitution and that my children who are the true victims are being denied their rights…we just shrug our shoulders to that…oh well…its “the law”
As for your comment about getting the support amount reduced…the child support calculator gives us a $12 break for our two legitimate biological children. I love how the law says the disturbed children of the promiscuous drug addict are worth more than my children who are wanted and loved…not just pawns in a bid to collect free child support money and government assistance.
Wow maybe I should put her husband’s name down on my next kid’s birth certificate…then he can pay me back the money he is currently stealing from my family!
DNA can get a man off of death row, but not out of child support.
Let’s throw out the cliche “best interests of the child” too… like some stranger’s children are somehow entitled to anything from my husband… like we have a duty to someone else’s kids when ours are getting screwed!
Anyone else have a true solution to this injustice? How about suing this woman for fraud, perjury and intentional infliction of emotional distress? How about suing on behalf of my children for equal protection?
Since these are my husband’s “children” then he is entitled to visitation, yet she wouldn’t let him anywhere the kids he is forced to pay for. Where is NC law now? NC law gladly enforces an unjust support order, but my husband was told by a NC judge that he doesn’t “recognize any Yankee court order” granting my husband visitation.
North Carolina law does not support paternity fraud our violate due process. Your husband can file an action seeking relief from the child support order and seeking a paternity test, however it seems that he has acknowledged (at least by not contesting paternity earlier and by seeking visitation in another court, that these children are his.
I truly am sorry that you are dealing with such a difficult situation, however if your husband does move forward with new evidence and request a DNA test proving the children are not his support will be discontinued.
As for the Order your husband obtained, the judge’s comment was certainly very informal, and borderline in appropriate, however the reason the order was not enforceable is that North Carolina is the home state of the children, and no other state has jurisdiction over the case at this time.
My husband NEVER acknowledged paternity and he has been fighting it since he was hit with it over 10 years ago. WA denied him a paternity test at the time of divorce. All of the NC lawyers we’ve hired have told us “the judge doesn’t want to hear paternity fraud cases.” The only reason we’d seek visitation at this point was in the hopes that taking those kids would convince his psycho ex that we are serious about ending this injustice. She knows the kids aren’t his- throws it in our faces. But yet if he is the “dad” he also has his full rights to those kids and even though we have absolutely no desire to deal with them, if she wants us to leave them alone, then she can terminate my husband’s parental rights AND his unjust child support obligation. Seems to me if she or the law really cared about those children, they’d see it was in their best interest to have a stable, normal family. Stealing money from another family and lying to them about where they come from in ot their best interests. She is married, her and her lazy husband live off of my family’s money. Her husband is the de facto parent- he holds himself out to be the parent- it should be his responsibility. My husband has never held himself as these kids dad, nor prevented the real father from asserting his rights. The only reason he has visitation is because it was part of the divorce and the only reason he married this woman was because she deceived him into thinking her first child is his. She later admitted she had slept with a least a dozen other people behind his back and he left immediately upon finding this out. She got pregnant with her second child after my husband left her- for spite. This child has the exact same bright orange hair as her lover at the time. She knows his full name and whereabouts. Of course she will never tell us.
I have done extensive research on paternity fraud. Only a handful of states have laws protecting men from paternity fraud- OH and GA offer complete relief. As far as I know, NC does not have paternity fraud legislation- it enjoys too much benefit from collecting child support from fathers- 30% of which are not the biological dad, but are too poor to pay for legal action because they are being bled dry by child support enforcement. It is unjust to assume that just because a man has not filed something to contest paternity that he is accepting the situation- most attorneys will NOT even entertain the idea of taking a case like this on. NO attorney in NC has been willing and we’ve been trying for 10 years. Also where are we or any other victims supposed to come up with the money to fight back when every dime is being stolen for someone else’s kids.
There is so much public delusion about the “dead beat” dad…a guy like my husband can’t get a word in in his defense. As long as the government doesn’t have to pay for these bastard children, it is okay that an innocent man does.
We will NEVER acknowledge or accept this FRAUD. I blame the woman responsible primarily, but the court and child support enforcement are also unjustly enriched at the expense of MY children.
As for no other state having jurisdiction- I love how NC- where the kids live, WA- where the original order is and any other state we may chose to live in will come after us for support with the blessing of the federal government, but as far as a man taking his rightful visitation, oh sorry you must jump through the hoops of the state the custodial parents chooses to run to. She is the one who fled. She is the one lying and committing fraud. So why is the law on her side?? Where is the relief?
What NC law allows support to be abated when DNA proves he is not the father? How do we get the court to grant a paternity test? Cause so far, we’ve been told there is no way to make this happen.
have you ever found help please let ne know my family is in the same boat the only difference is they were not married and we know the real father