Question--not married, cheating partner,


#1

I have a question about my rights with my child. I did not marry my daughter’s father. I moved in with him when I was seven months pregnant, uprooting my seven year old son’s life. To make a long story short, I discovered when my daughter was three weeks old my partner was having random sex on craigslist–I have proof, emails, pictures of ads with him naked, emails and letters in his handwriting about the incident, etc. I had to get back on my feet financially to move again but underwent couseling with him for sex addiction/lying,etc. Six months after the first discovery, I found a virtual affair (sexual emails,etc) with a woman. I moved out.

For a year and a half following we hung on here and there. We would date some, not date, and tried to sort things out for the kids. I eventually left him when the lies and crude sexual behavior never stopped ie: calling personal ads, etc.

I believe he is unstable mentally. He has broken my cell phone over a text he didnt like, drove insane with me in the car, punched holes in walls and broke chairs in front of his daughters, and lies like no other. He’s also smart–a PHD Biochemist who preaches conservative values.

I make a great deal more than him–I work 70 plus hours a week. However I still pay the insurance for our daughter. He is active and pays half the daycare and all of her needs at his home–clothes, etc.

Is there any way he would owe me any type of child support? How would custody be granted? Since I am not married to him, what rights do I have–if any?

Would any of the infedility matter–the moral character is indeed in question–naked pictures, asking for random sex with groups, etc.

Thanks for any help.


#2

You have the same rights with respect to custody as any parent, married or not. He also has a child support obligation. I suggest you contact child support enforcement and get a case file opened. They will assist you along the way and do what is needd to have him pay the proper amount of support.

As for custody, you can file an action on your own and have a court rule on the issue. While infidelity will not be considered (even if you were married, it rarely is) any dangerous behavior that puts your child at risk would certainly be considered.
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