Sex Addiction


#1

I am wondering what my rights are in regards to custody due to my husbands sex addiction. We split the end of 2009 due to his continued infidelity by meeting up with other woman on hook up websites designed for married ppl to cheat on their spouses. In addition to those sites he also joined a couple BDSM websites for hookups. His porn addiction esclated to the point where normal porn is no longer satisfing, and now he enjoys domination and watching women being whipped to the point of bleeding. Since i have left the house, i have been told by neighbors that there is a lot of action going on over at his house, that they have seen multiple different cars in the driveway on random days along with random women in and out. I have since in the last 2 weeks, gone over myself and each time there is a different woman over there. Currently we are doing a 50/50 split, but considering he appears to be getting worse with his addiction instead of getting the help he promised, i am concerned at what point does this interfere with my son’s well being and am petrified if he spends too much time over there he will pick up on what he is doing and end up addicted himself.

What are my rights? If we bring this to court what proof would i need to provide? What are the chances i can get him full time? I have phone records, credit card reciepts, emails, ect. Oh yes also forgot to add that he is also addicted to steriods and have proof of that as well. I was not smart enough to somehow get a screenshot of his online profiles for proof, but not sure if that would even make a difference. He did do the bulk of his porn and hook up searching on his work computer can i subpoena that, can i make him provide credit card reciepts going back the last few months since i left to see what else he has been doing?? He has admitted twice he has a problem, the last time just a month ago, told me he was going to start the 12 step program, but as usual he was lying because he has been in it full force since the day i left.

My son is only 4, so hoping just his age alone will help my case even if he fights me? Any advice would be helpful. I also want to add, I am not a vindictive person, i believe both parents should participate in the raising of a child and there will be a time when a son needs his father… I just don’t want my son exposed to this… i would be willing to negotiate custody with him, but not until after he recieved treatment.


#2

Custody is determined on what is in the best interests of the child. Clearly you have valid concerns that your ex is too focused on himself and his inappropriate behavior could damage your child. You need to prove in court that it is not in your child’s best interests to spend time with his dad while his father is behaving in this manner.

You can subpoena his bank records and ask that he turn over the dating information on his computer.