Greetings. He cannot appoint you as a liason for visitation. He must arrange the visitation and such for his child(ren). I can only imagine how him communicating directly with her will feel to you, but that is what is correct.
She cannot refuse to allow the children to spend time with your husband (regardless of you being present), unless you pose some danger to her children. Since the children are blameless in this situation, and I believe that you realize that, she cannot stop him for seeing the children. Yes, if you file an action in court, you must first go through mediation (however it will just be your husband and her, as you will not be allowed to attend). Thank you.
Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax
10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax
1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax
The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.