With your current custody situation it may be that you could work out an arrangement so that you meet the father’s 1/2 way for visitations, or allow the father’s to modify child support to include gas for driving expenses…this may be a way to alleviate some of the stress of traveling.
It is in the best interest of the children to have both their parents involved as much as possible. It is your belief that it’s in both children’s best interest to relocate with you.
Is there a specific reason or just that you do not want to leave them with the other parent?
Generous visitations can only be every weekend and vacations or when school is out…

With regards to the childs best interest - my 5 year old’s father is unstable in jobs - in the past 7 years that I have been with him he has had 7 or more jobs - it is his only child and again he has no family around (3 hours away - VA) and does not want to let go of her - he cannot really support himself let alone support her - with regards to child support on his end - he pays her daycare bill and health insurance - with regards to my son - It would be hard for me to walk away from him and leave him with his dad - but he has told me that he does not want to live with his dad he jsut does not want to leave his friends - his father is a good person, stable job, stable and good family - he has remarried and has another child - child support is not really a concern - I could walk away from it and still meet him 1/2 way on travel arrangements as well giving him considerable visitation - I just don’t want a court battle and I want to remain cordial as it is now (Relationship wise)- I also feel that my son will talk to the judge and tell him that he wants to stay because of his friends rather than to live with his dad - but I feel he could make new friends where we are moving to and still be happy - he does not do anything with his dad relationship wise that he will miss - when he is over there he is never at home and always at a friends house or going somewhere with his friends - his dad spends time with him a night some watching tv or checking his homework when he is over there, etc. They go on family vacations - but the last one they took they left my son here and did not include him - so I am twisted on my feelings with my son. My daughter on the other hand I feel would be better off with me seeing I am stable in life, job, money, ect - where he father is not - he is a good person and is good to her but I don’t think he is stable enough to support the two of them.

If you cannot work out a visitation schedule you should file an action to modify custody. Given the circumstances the court will likely grant you permission to move.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax

Charlotte Office
301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Phone: (704)307.4600
Main Fax: (704) 9343.0044

Durham & Chapel Hill Office
1829 East Franklin Street
Building 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
(919) 321.0780


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I have sole custody of my 12 year old son and I have joint custody of my 5 year old daughter - I am relocating 3 hours away from my current residence and would like to know how difficult this will be in taking the kids with me. My daughter has no family where she currently lives other than her father. My son has all of his family where we currently live but does not want to leave me but wants to stay only for his friends. The fathers are putting up a big fight and I feel that it is in the best interests of my children that they relocate with me and we have a visitation plan with the fathers that offers generous visitation. My kids have never been denied access to their fathers and I don’t intend to start - but I am getting remarried and my current fiance cannot relocate due to his position with the Government. How should I proceed?