Seperation between my son and his wife


I would say that you need to have your son get a separation agreement drawn up and soon. He can type one up himself. She can not keep the child away from him. Make sure the money he pays is in check form or anything but cash. Record telephone conversations for later use, as long as one of the parties in the conversations knows it is being recorded it can be used in court. Keep records of everything, and have him keep records too.
Have him get on this site also. There’s a lot of emotional and legal support on here that he will need. Check through the “Separation” section on this home page. There’s also a section on Alienation of Affection and someone posted something on one of these forums just a couple days ago about a pregnancy by another man that happened before the divorce was final.
Best of luck.


Also, there was a very good reply to another post titled “keeping son away” that should make you feel a little better about her not letting him see his child. And it would be considered abandonment if she left the home without an agreement regardless that she took the child with her. That’s not really an issue though since for the separation to start one of the parties has to leave the home and NC is a no fault state. The law does not let the woman take the children, that is decided between the husband and wife when the separation begins. My husband’s ex left the children with him so that they would not be uprooted because she wanted to “live the single life”, but they have 50/50 joint custody with equal time now.


Dear wmelissa:

Greetings. I am not willing to read all of this so I will answer the first question I see and you can post more succinct questions in response to my post if you have further issues that you want me to address.

If anyone leaves a marriage, it is technically abandonment, but he can answer her argument with constructive abandonment or acts which are indignities to him if she did those things. Thanks

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

301 McCullough Drive Suite 510
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax


The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.


My son’s wife decided that she no longer wanted to be married. She up and leaves with their child leaving him with the bills. My son finds out that she has been calling a guy that she has been seeing from their cell phone records while they were married. She has been pushing him for quick, simple seperation papers but he will not agree. He has been paying for their child each week. When she gets mad at him for any little thing, she says “You will not see the child” Which I know that she cannot do, but they have nothing in writing. Why is it that if a man walks out of a marriage and throws up his hands and gives up that it is considered abandonment? If she is the one that walks out and takes the child because the law almost always lets the woman take the child, is she considered abandonment? She left my son and was immediately in another relationship. Now, today we find out that she is pregnant with this other man’s child and has been pregnant for a few months or more. Are they legally seperated just because she decides to leave the marriage? My son was destroyed by this! Yes they had their problems but he had just bought her a diamond in February because she only had a wedding band from the marriage and she called me up so excited about this ring and that they had been doing great. Then in March she was going to bars and leaving their son at home at night for my son to watch. At the end of March she was moving out! Why do these young kids just think that marriage is just a game, if it does not work out they will just get a divorce. Another thing that bothers me is the laws really need to change for grandparents rights such as myself. They sort of have no rights at all! I know that I can see my grandson when my son gets to see him but the law need to change. When my daughter-n-law gets mad and does not get her way she lets us all know that we cannot see the child. I do keep a journal about all of this, from the day that they got married almost two years ago. It has been such a rollar coaster with her in our lives. I just want to think about my grandson and what is best for him at this point. I belive that my son is going to check into this alination of affection law. He wants to get custody of their child who is almost two and let her get visitation. Do you have any advice for my son beside me staying out of it? I love my famliy and I do not want to see them hurt or taken advantage of.
What are his chances on getting custody? Or joint custody? What are his chances of alia. of affection with the other man even though their marriage was up and down? One more question, why do lawyers have to cost so much? Thank you!

Concerned Mom/Grandmother