What kind of dirt would you be able to use for custody purposes? What he does on his own time is his own business and not yours. If he’s dealing drugs or involved in some porn outfit, then MAYBE the emails could be used. I don’t know if it illegal, but you could be looked upon negatively. It certainly isn’t ethical. You really have no business snooping in emails unless you have a GENUINE concern (abuse, drugs, porn…).
Don’t be too quick to pass judgement. I too have some emails that show plans that are clearly not in the best interest of the child in question. I too, would like to know if & how these can be presented in court.
If it was HIS email account, and you entered it WITHOUT permission, not only would a judge probably NOT allow that evidence in court, but it could be construed as a violation of the ECPA and is a felony in both the Federal and North Carolina statutes. Be very, very careful.
I would have to agree with the other posters. There may be some stuff that you could use in the e-mails but you would have to find another way of presenting the information to the court. You will have a difficult time doing this if you aren’t even supposed to know about it…
What is done on his own time when the children are not present, unless illegal, does not affect the custodial time. Even if it is illegal then you would need some other way to find information/proof to present to the courts. This type of information after the date of separation is very tricky to have knowledge of…e-mails, phone records, even recordings are difficult to present to the courts.
bluehorse, I’d be interested to know what plans you have knowledge of that you believe could be used against the other parent in court?
Since it is a pending matter and this is a public forum, I cannot yet post that here
Ok…then I will say this, what the courts rule as being in the best interest of the child and what you believe to be in the best interest of the child may be two very different standards. Be very careful of what you intend to use, especially if it has been gotten by less that ethical means.
Every parent believes that they know what is in their child’s best interest. As far as everyone else goes, that may be true…this is not always the case and is not including the other parent. When you had a child together, you entered into an unspoken agreement that you would raise that child together. What normally, not always, happens after divorce is that one parent wants to call all the shots and the other parent has to compete for time.
Before you use ANYTHING in court, ask yourself if you would still be upset about it if you were still together or married…
Let me ask:
Does anyone know if a Private Investigator has the right/privilage to ‘hack’ into an email account to find evidence of a possible affair? I know investigators and detectives have the right to do so like in cases of murder/kidnapping in order to find evidence, but what about just based on suspicion of an affair?
I think that investigators and detectives only have that right if they are given a warrant for suspicion. Hacking into someone’s e-mail is probably not something that is exactly “legal”…
There is no legal way to hack into an account, by definition hacking is using illegal or unauthorized means to enter an account/computer system. From my understanding when the password had previously been disclosed by the other party and/or they shared it with another, they have given you “permission” to login until they tell you to stop or you are not allowed to.
So, if they suddenly refer to things that you know were only revealed in email correspondance, and you know you’ve never shared your password with that person, then they have probably gotten that information by getting into the email SOMEHOW. Maybe using one of the many ‘password breaker’ assistance things you read online?
There are numerous ways that people do that (keystroke tracker programs, ect…) So yes, more than likely they either know you well enough to figure out your passwords (plausible) or they got it with some other inappropriate means.
I opened a can of worms, didn’t I? Some of you were so quick to give me a tongue lashing for me snooping in my husbands email. I didn’t think it was anyone’s business as to WHY I was doing it so I didn’t elaborate. My husband was having an affair with another woman. They were exchanging nude photos of my 5 year old son in a bath tub. My husband sent over a dozen of these photos to this woman. I also discovered a bunch of emails with “new account” information from where he had set up user accounts on pornography sites that also are full of child pornography. I suspect a link between the photos he took of my son naked in a tub and his pornography activities.
Again: we were separated but still legally married. Yes, I snooped. I’m glad that I did. Because now I know that my son is in serious danger of sexual exploitation. But my problem remains this: Everything that I found out I got from snooping in his email. I am weighing the pros and cons of using this stuff against him in court. If I end up slapped with a felony for looking in his email then I don’t want to reveal that I was snooping. Please don’t lecture me now about how I should do what is best for my kid. I’m trying. I’m also trying to keep my own life from being ruined by ending up with a felony.
So please ignore all these miscellaneous facts and stick to the main question: During my marital separation period I was looking in my husband’s email without his permission. I am the one who set up his email and therefore knew the password. Is it a criminal act that I can get in trouble for? Or is it not a criminal act because we were still married? Really: think about it: can YOU sue your own spouse for looking in your email?
It sounds like you are trying to act in the best interests of the child (and all children). Keep doing the right thing.
Don’t know if this helps. If you can interpret all the legalese, I found this on another site.
Monitoring of Email Communications: The monitoring of a spouse
OK - since you clarified this, there’s another option here. If you found child porn on the e-mails, then I suggest you let someone know. I know there are agencies that monitor pedifiles and preditors of this nature and contacting the local authorities to turn him in annonmously would not be illegal. If he has visited child porn sites then you have bigger things to worry about. If he is in trouble with the law for this couldn’t that be brought up during court?? Wouldn’t child pornography be a reason for you to retain or win primary custody?
comingclean2, thank you for finding that statute…I searched for it for a while but couldn’t think of how it would be titled.
Yes, by intercepting his emails without his knowledge or permission you committed a violation of federal wiretapping laws. You cannot use this evidence in court. If you admit your behavior on the stand you can be subject to criminal charges, you may want to speak to an attorney about asserting your fifth amendment privilege on the stand.
If you think your husband has involved your child in pornography you need to take this matter to the police, not save it for leverage in a custody case.
P.S. Please feel free to bring up this or any other topic on our live call-in show every Wednesday at 11:00 a.m. EST. Visit radio.rosen.com/live for details
Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax
Charlotte Office
301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Phone: (704)307.4600
Main Fax: (704) 9343.0044
Durham & Chapel Hill Office
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Building 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
(919) 321.0780
The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.
I find this hard to believe.
My husband had an affair with another woman. He breached every marital promise, oath and covenant that he made with me. He obliterated our family - causing extreme emotional damage to me and our child… but I cannot sue him for alienation of affection or for the cruelty that he heaped on me.
But he can sue me and I can get hit with a felony for reading his email while we were separated - email from an account that I set up and created a password for - an account that I created for him to use to talk to me, but instead used to help carry on an affair.
God help this nation if this is what our society has decided is “justice”.
shangri-la I could not agree with you more.
You can bring up the evidence of his marital misconduct if you are entitled to seek spousal support. I realize that this is a small consolation and I am sorry for all that you are going through.
P.S. Please feel free to bring up this or any other topic on our live call-in show every Wednesday at 11:00 a.m. EST. Visit radio.rosen.com/live for details
Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax
Charlotte Office
301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Phone: (704)307.4600
Main Fax: (704) 9343.0044
Durham & Chapel Hill Office
1829 East Franklin Street
Building 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
(919) 321.0780
The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.
I am divorced and me and my ex are going back to court over custody. I had been snooping in his email for dirt to use in court and want to know if I can get in trouble for it.
Here are the details…
When we were happily married I set up his free email account for him, including creating his password. He had this same email account and password after he moved out and we were separated (but still married). I used his password to read his email during the separation. Eventually he changed the password and I couldn’t get in anymore.
If I make reference to things I read in his email during that legal separation period, then it will tell him that I was snooping on him. I don’t care if he knows that I was reading his stuff. I just don’t want to shoot myself in the foot by revealing that I was snooping. Maybe it wasn’t morally right, but was it against the law?
I printed some of his emails from during that time and want to be able to use them. I know that it might be hard to admit them as evidence, legal or not… but that isn’t my concern just yet. My first concern is: can I get in legal trouble for reading or printing out his emails for my personal knowledge during our separation period?
Thanks so much.