Trial separation?


#1

I would like to have a one-month trial separation from my husband for the month of January, without it possibly hurting me financially or legally if I do decide to divorce.

A friend of mine will not be in her house (here in town) for the month of January, so it would be convenient if I could “house-sit” for her.

My husband has a bad temper and can be verbally abusive, and is generally neglectful of our marriage. I would like to take a break and see how it feels being away from him. I’d also like to see if this would motivate him to seek assistance with his temper problem. - Btw, he thinks that we have a good marriage, he says that I treat him extremely well, and that I’m a good wife.

I’ve been told that leaving the house for a month could possibly constitute abandonment, or he could say that he was the aggrieved party, if I moved on to divorce. Is any of this true? I want to be careful about what I’m doing. …I did see this on your website, on the subject of Abandonment:

Abandonment occurs when a spouse brings cohabitation to an end without justification, without the consent of the other spouse, and without the intent of renewing cohabitation. All three of these elements must be proved by the spouse seeking to show the other spouse’s abandonment. A spouse is justified in leaving the other spouse, however, when the withdrawing spouse cannot continue the marital relation with safety, health, and self-respect.

North Carolina cases also recognize constructive abandonment as marital fault as well. Constructive abandonment arises when the other spouse does not physically leave the home but, rather, commits affirmative acts of cruelty or neglect or other willful failure to fulfill the obligations of marriage.

The dependent spouse may be driven to leave the home, in fact, by such acts of cruelty or neglect. Notice that the dependent spouse who is forced to leave the home by the other spouse’s misconduct not only does not abandon the injuring spouse but has, in fact, been constructively abandoned.

If anything, according to this, it would seem that I have been constructively abandoned. (Not that I’m interested in pursuing that.) I just want to make sure that I wouldn’t be possibly hurting myself by leaving him for one month.

Thank you!