Adultery


#1

My wife and I were divorce I had found out a few months later that the 2nd child that was born during our marriage ended up not being mine. With adultery being illegal in North Carolina what can be done legally to my ex wife also the 3rd party member? Also I will be taking her to court for custody as soon as we can get in.How will this look on her or how will it help my case any?
Also will her keepin this information from me about the child being mine until after the divorce will that have any impact on how the custody case effects me any? Would this favor on my behalf or hers?


#2

Are you sure you found out after you two were divorced or when she found out she was pregnant and the child may not be yours?
Were you guys seperated during the time she got pregnant? Did you guys get back together after she got pregnant?


#3

The district attorney makes the decision of what crimes to prosecute. Realistically, a criminal case is unlikely as adultery has not been prosecuted in many decades.

You may sue the third party in civil court for money damages.

If you are not the father of the child, you will not be able to gain custody.


#4

[quote=“Erin Clarey”]The district attorney makes the decision of what crimes to prosecute. Realistically, a criminal case is unlikely as adultery has not been prosecuted in many decades.

You may sue the third party in civil court for money damages.

If you are not the father of the child, you will not be able to gain custody.[/quote]

I am looking at getting custody of the child that is mine only 1 of the children were not mine, not the child that ended up not being mine. I was wonder how much adultery is looked at in a custody case.


#5

[quote=“Unfair”]Are you sure you found out after you two were divorced or when she found out she was pregnant and the child may not be yours?
Were you guys seperated during the time she got pregnant? Did you guys get back together after she got pregnant?[/quote]
She had actually told me that the child was not mine about a month after the legal seperation was done, she had gotten pregnant while we were married.


#6

I understand you two are married, but were you two seperated, meaning living under the same roof? Did she have the intent to get a divorce but you guys got back together?


#7

Are you a lawyer?Or someone with the same experience. I thought this forum was for lawyers to answer.


#8

[quote=“Erin Clarey”]The district attorney makes the decision of what crimes to prosecute. Realistically, a criminal case is unlikely as adultery has not been prosecuted in many decades.

You may sue the third party in civil court for money damages.

If you are not the father of the child, you will not be able to gain custody.[/quote]

Erin,

I am looking at getting custody of the child that is mine ,not the child that is not mine. I was wonder how much adultery is looked at in a custody case. Also if there was multiple occurences how much that would take into effect.


#9

In custody cases any factor that can affect the children’s best interests is considered. Adultery can be considered insofar as morality issues go, however no one factor is determinative. It would be up to the individual judge to determine how much weight any specific issue would carry.


#10

Thank you,
Last question of the day as I am in NC and my ex wife is from Tx (currently in NC as well) and I did not get custody ,would I have to allow her to take the child all the way to TX? As it would stop me from being able to see me son as often.


#11

The judge would decide the issue of relocation. If you ex wishes to move with the child she will have the burden to prove to the court that moving across the country from his father is in his best interests (very hard to do).


#12

If she does decide to move how much in advance notice does she have to give me before she can up and leave with or without our son?

Also as far as holidays have been she is refusing holiday visits due to there not being an order. Myself I wouldn’t think there that should matter. There shouldn’t have to be an order, I know that it is only right to swap every other holiday atleast.With or without an order.Would that be something to mention when we go to court or leave be?


#13

I was asking those questions because I have seen this type of subject first hand and I could have given you advice since you seem to live in the onslow county, (maybe, unless this is who i think it is). Unless you can prove the mother being unfit, it is going to be hard for you to take the child away. If she leaves with your child, you would be getting more visitation time during the summer months. You will still keep every other major Hoilday. Transportation would be split 50/50. Are you still military? That will weigh alot in court. Not saying you wouldn’t make sure your child is well taken care, but some judge’s look at it differently. I hope everything works out for the best of the child.


#14

She cannot decide to move without your consent. If she begins making plans to leave the state with your child you may file a motion for emergency custody to prevent her from leaving with the child until a full trial can be had with respect to custody.

Her refusal to allow you to have your child on the holidays will not look good for her in court, and should definitely be brought to the judge’s attention.


#15

1 I live in Carteret County but I wouldn’t imagine that the couty would make the difference
2 I EAS’d a few month ago
3 Like I have said if you are not a lawyer I do not wish for imput ,as any cases you may have seen may be different then mine.


#16

[quote=“Erin Clarey”]She cannot decide to move without your consent. If she begins making plans to leave the state with your child you may file a motion for emergency custody to prevent her from leaving with the child until a full trial can be had with respect to custody.

Her refusal to allow you to have your child on the holidays will not look good for her in court, and should definitely be brought to the judge’s attention.[/quote]

Thank you Erin.


#17

There are other’s who have experience in case’s that have needed advice in this forum. She was only trying to help you out. An attorney is going to respond to your post, but it may not happen in court the way you want it to. These attorney’s do not know the full details on each and every case. They’re attorneys, and have help many people, but not all case’s turn out fair. Try to be a little nicer if people here would like to give their opinions on situations.


#18

I had stated to her prior to this I do not want anyones else’s advice as no one case is the same. I’m also not looking for the answer as to what will happen in court as I undertand an attoneycan not give these answer’s .I’m only looking for the answers to my questions ,which the attorney did answer very well.


#19

Erin I would like to know what has to be proven in an adultery case…Would neighbors watching /seeing another guy staying at the house late at night/over night , Or would I actually have to prove sexual intercourse?

Also due to us not having court yet and property distribution not taken care of what will happen to the items that belong to me that she may have gotten rid of?


#20

To prove adultery you must satisfy two elements; 1.) that the parties to the affair had the inclination to engage in sexual relations (ie: romantic feelings towards one another); 2.) the opportunity to do so (ie: footage of the parties staying together overnight).

If you ex disposed of items of your property, she can be made to account for those itmes in a final distribution.