Alimony Formula

It is my understanding, that only alimony is affected by an affair… Namely, he would forfeit his claim to get alimony from you. But since you and he have already reached an agreement on alimony and there doesn’t seem to be any real assets, there is really nothing, that I can see which you can do. I’d check with your lawyer though.

Further, I’m not sure that webcam sex would qualify as “real sex” in terms of the Criminal Conversation statute. Again, I would check with your lawyer though. Also a heads up, be careful how you collect the “proof”; if you break the law in its collection then it is inadmissible in court.

Hope that helps.

Thanks for the input. Please let me clarify. My husband did have an affair during our marriage, prior to our separation. He has also been, and continues to be, involved in an online relationship that will soon be committed in the flesh.

I am the dependent spouse so I am the one eligible for alimony, and he is agreeable to it. What I’m trying to determine is if a calculator or formula exists to determine a fair and equitable standard for alimony so I know where to begin “negotiations”.

As for Criminal Conversation, it’s not something I’m considering at all. And as for collecting proof, I’ve obtained everything legally and shared it all with my husband.

I’m trying to be nice about this, but I plan to protect myself, too.

Just a suggestion, but if you are looking to keep your husband out of someone else’s bed during the separation then I would suggest sharing the evidence with the other woman. I doubt that he is going to share the information with this woman on the risk she is taking. Though if she is as unfeeling as your husband seems to be, it may not make a difference. So it may just be best to start living your life on your terms.

I would just make sure you get alimony terms which are agreeable to you and a property distribution with which you can live. But as far as I know there is not a formula which can be used to calculate a “fair and equitable” alimony amount. Your lawyer though may have a rule-of-thumb (based on her/his experience) on what an appropriate alimony amount would be.

Hope that helps.

Unfortunately the “lady” in question knows everything. Even more than I do possibly. And she’s in the middle of a divorce, too. But since my husband doesn’t care and she doesn’t respect fidelity, they will be consumating their relationship this weekend. Woo. Hoo.

Thanksfor the feedback!

My husband and I are divorcing. He commited adultery in October but I didn’t find out until 2 weeks ago, 2 months into our separation. He has agreed to pay alimony for 5 years (the duration of our marriage) and 1/2 of his pension. We have all of our financial statements. Is there a formula to use to determine support? We have no children, no house, and no major debt other than my student loans acquired during the marriage.

Also, we separated on 2/6. He had been having an online affair (webcam sex!) prior to that and plans to consumate that relationship next week. There is intent to have sex with this woman and he will be staying in her home so there is opportunity. However, since the sex will occur post-separation, is there anything that can be done? I know that it will be proof of pre-separation activity and that I could sue the woman from the pre-separation affair, but what about other options regarding my husband?