Alimony/PSS if different states

When my stbx and I separated, I relocated to Virginia and have been a VA resident now for over a year. My stbx filed for divorce in NC and is trying to sue me for alimony and PSS. He makes more than I do but still is trying to claim he is the dependent spouse. My attorney advised me that he can’t sue me for alimony/PSS in a NC case while I am a VA resident, that he would have to come to VA for that. Is this true?

Also, he has been drawing military BAH at the dependent rate (i’m his dependent) yet refuses to help me with bills. I have also heard that this is illegal. Is there a recourse against this?

Thanks

Your husband can sue you for rights arising out of the marriage in North Carolina so long as you were properly served. Your responsive pleading should include a counterclaim for PSS and alimony as you are the dependant spouse.