Alimony questions

My husband is the one wanting a divorce. We have three children, been married for 16 years, and I was diagnosed with a chronic illness within the last year. My husband makes $135,000 yearly. Although I am not diasabled, my doctor has recommened not working to avoid promoting my disease. I have stayed at home with the children for the last 9 years. There has been infidelity committed by my husband numerous times, the last one within this year. My husband thinks I am out of line in what I have found would be a fair alimony according to the internet…

I want the time line to be payment until I remarry because of my health issues and his infidelity. He says for only a few years.

I have found amounts of $3300 monthly. He thinks $1000 monthly.

I will have to provide my own health insurance which will be outrageous.
I would like to not have to work, at least full time but even if I did, this amount is only reduced by a couple hundred on the calculators I have found.

Are there any estimates you can give me or atleast who is closer to what could be awarded?


Your illness should play a role in the amount of alimony awarded. If you can prove adultery on his part and you are the dependent spouse, then alimony must be awarded. However, there is no definitive time length for an alimony award nor is anything set in stone for the amount awarded. It appears that you are trying to settle this divorce without going to Court. In a separation agreement, the parties can agree to anything that the parties see fit, including medical coverage and insurance. Sometimes, a judge will make medical coverage part of “alimony”. Since you have a fairly long term marriage (16 yrs.), you should at least receive alimony for 8 years, maybe more depending on the circumstances. It’s all a gamble and you have to hope the gods will smile down on you and your circumstances. Also child support for three children will be awarded until the children reach age l8 or beyond if incorporated into a separation agreement. If this matter goes to Court, you will have to document your expenses as the burden of proof is on you, but that in itself isn’t a guarantee either. With an income of 135,000, you might can figure a Court would allow you 30% of that income which would be about 40,000, but that also is no guarantee that it would happen. You have a number of factors that may influence the outcome…a chronic illness, 3 children, doctor recommendation that you do not work, a 16 year marriage, being out of the workforce and homemaker contributions, infidelity on his part, etc. etc. What I would advise, is simply not to back down in the negotiations. If the negotiations do not go your way, then your option is to go to Court. And you never know what the Court will do. It could be better or it could be worse. Also, if you are 50 or over and disabled, you qualifiy for 50% of your husband’s social security since you have been married longer than 10 years. If he dies, you get 100%. For someone who makes 135,000 a year, 1000 a month in alimony seems like too little to me. You need to talk all of this over with a good lawyer. I wish you all the best and I hope it works out for you!