I don’t think so; however, yo may want to keep a journal of when he calls and maybe record the calls in case he threatens you or harrasses you then you file charges on him.
Adultery is a crime in North Carolina, if you engage in a sexual relationship with a man other than your spouse while you are still married you can be prosecuted for adultery. If your spouse is making threats against you that give you a concern for your safety, I would seek a domestic violence protective order.
Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax
10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax
1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax
The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.
It sounds as though your STBX wants to use your relationship with your new friend as the reason you left him. This is pretty typical since most people would rather believe it was someone else influencing their partner rather than that their partner didn’t want them any more.
I would say that unless the relationship with your new friend started before you were separated, living separate and apart from your husband, you have nothing to worry about. If it started before, then your STBX will need to show that this is the reason you left. If it started after, then just keep in mind you are still married and while it’s only a misdemeanor and rarely prosecuted, adultery is still illegal and could impact custody, alimony, and equitable distribution.
Take charge of your situation so that you can quit feeling so defensive with your STBX. Let your new friend know what’s going on. Keeping a record of things said or done is always a good idea. Record phone calls if it’s possible. Make sure that you are not too affectionate in public with your new friend. Ask your STBX not to call your place of employment any more and get a recorder on your telephone at home. If he continues to contact your work, tell your employer that you are being harassed. Do not be embarassed to let your employer know what your situation is, if they don’t already know. These are people that know you so they will likely be on you side. When he calls to harass you about your new friendship, tell him it’s none of his business and you aren’t going to discuss it with him. If he wants to know names or how long it’s been going on…tell him to find out for himself. Let him waste his time and energy searching for something that wasn’t there. Keep in mind, only 9-10 months to go [;)]
Also, keep in mind that a judge and his reasoning in court is unpredictable. You would not believe some judges. They will throw out valid supported evidence as hearsay and except unsupported hearsay as fact.
Your in for a good learning experience with Family Law!
Do you have a separation agreement? They usually have some wording to say that you are able to live as if you are single and not married, i.e. your new friend would be fine. Just don’t let your STBX get to you, just blow it off. Trust me, I went through all of that…it is not fun at all, but the more you believe his threats the more he will threaten. Don’t listen to his threats…you have the ability to not answer the phone or to hang up the phone, exercise them.
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I have been seperated and living on my own for over three months now, and I have meet a new friend in the past month. We have been talking and getting closer each day with alot in common. Before I left my husband, we did not speak or have any type of sexual realtions in over a year, so please do not think I left my husband for this new friend. Our marriage was well over in that last year, it just took me that long to grow some b___s and get out own my. Well now my ex knows about my friend, called me at work today and told me that he is going to take me down with this. Can he or what can he do if anything? Please help or advise me on this because I am clueless. I haven’t done anything wrong…I left a bad situtation for a reason, I am not trying to get into another one. Thanks