Can not locate "husband" at all, have exhausted all resources


I rushed into a marriage with a gentleman in Nov 2008, he deployed with the reserves in Jan 09. While he was gone, it was clear the marriage was not going to work for either of us. When he returned, he never came back to our home. He got out of the reserves, quit his job with the state and moved - never apprising me of where or how to contact him. I have searched the internet, social media and paying for people search services to no avail.

I am not even sure if we are even still married - what if he got a divorce already by placing an ad like one must do in NC? Is there any way to find out?

Also, just need guidance on how to go about placing an ad for him or what exactly I need to do.

I complete my 1st divorce in 2007- was married 10 years - with no problems on my own, just filing the paperwork. This seems so complicated and I just want to be done with it :).

Please advise.


You are correct that you will have to serve him by publication (a legal “ad” in the newspaper) if you cannot locate an address for him with due diligence. Also be sure to check jail/prison records and obituaries.

NC statute dictates the language to be used in the legal “ad.” Take a look at our Notice of Service of Process by Publication.

The Notice must run once a week for three consecutive weeks in a newspaper that is qualified to run legal advertisements. The newspaper must also service an area that your husband is thought to be or in the area of his last known address.

Once the Notice has run, the newspaper will send you an actual clipping on the newspaper, and you must file it with the court along with an Affidavit of Service by Publication.

You can check with the vital records office of the state in which you were married about whether or not they have notice of a divorce. You can also check in the clerk’s office of the county in which you live or in the county in which you think your husband might live, if you know.

Anna Ayscue

Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh • Wake Forest

Rosen Online | Unlimited confidential access to a North Carolina attorney for $199/mo - click here

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