Greetings. My suggestion is to get the 14 year old into immediate counseling. Next, you should have an attorney modify the court order between your friend and his ex-wife (through a consent order) so that there is no question what is going on, if you do decide to give up hope on the 14 year old.
You can call the police to bring your children home when she does not return them. Bottom line is that she may be great to a 14 year old, and he or she may have to learn the hard way…or may never learn anything and become just like her. Schizophrenia has been known to run in families and has a high rate of suicide.
Your best bet is counseling. Take the 14, 12, and 10 year old now. Go as a family. Have the friend ask for help and loosen up the rules. Best of luck …
Janet L. Fritts
Attorney at Law
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.