Child Support Issue and visitation


Husband #1 can’t change anything without a legal precedent. Just because your 16yo has moved out doesn’t change her minor status; is she now married? That might make a difference, but see how your custody order is worded. Right now, from what I can see, he is in contempt, at least for not paying insurance. You can sue him along those lines to recoup insurance expenses if you have been the one paying all along. All of this can be done by yourself at the clerk of court’s office or your DSS office.

As for the 2nd husband, since you have a child, you will need to have some kind of separation and custody agreement in place before your daughter leaves your custody. Without it he can legally keep her, and pursuing that out of state will be very difficult. I would go to DSS about this as well, and they will pursue finding out where he is and how much he makes (unless he’s under the table, he’s in the system somewhere). They will then correctly and legally determine the child support he is supposed to pay–though, be fair and advise them he has been paying something all along, and give a proper accounting of those payments. Since he is paying, then he at least has a vested interest in seeing his child, which is more than I can say for the bum you married the first time. You can probably write your own custody order and have it filed with the clerk of court (I’m guessing) but if it’s flawed in any way, oh well…


you should also see if you qualify for state assistance. they usually give a court appointed attorney with certain custody issues when you qualify.


Way to go matador, I didn’t know that. Do you mean if she’s receiving welfare?


Regarding 1st ex- contact child support enforcement in both Gaston and Mecklenburg County. Mecklenburg will be able to help you enforce the child support order. They will have the state’s attorney working on the State’s behalf to enforce your support order. Check with Gaston to see what you need to do to be able to work with the local child support agency. (start with Clerk for the county to find the contact information.)

Regarding ex #2- Since it sounds like you do not have a custody agreement and you need something quickly, you could write a short statement about your intent and your ex’s that this is only for a short visit, including dates. Both sign before a notary. When you can, look at our web site about custody agreements for future planning.

Deborah M. Throm
Rosen Law Firm
1829 E. Franklin Street, Bldg. 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.265.0017 direct
919.321.0780 main voice

4101 Lake Boone Trail
Suite 500
Raleigh, NC 27607
919.256.1544 direct
919.787.6668 main voice

301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
704.644.2531 ext. 100


Hello, I have 2 ex husbands… …I have 2 girls by my 1st ex husband. In year 1999 we had court ordered child support …in Gaston County…$659.00 for both and him pay insurance and visitation…He has never paid insurance and my oldest daughter at 16 has now moved out…because she had a baby…and I know this needs to be revised, but I can’t get him to return my calls…he lives with another woman that hates me…he doesn’t call or see our 15 year old daughter because of his girlfriend and he decided on his own that he would just give me $300.00 per month…I have called and left messages at his work…he has changed his cell phone…and I have moved to back Mecklenburg county.( In the same county he is in…)…what do I do…he will not communicate with me or our daughter,

2nd situation…2nd husband and I have a 7 year old daughter and he moved to Indiana and is unemployed (so he says) and we have nothing in court,no nothing…he wants her to visit him in Indiana at CHristmas …is there a legal form that we can get notorized , just so I feel safe …and also he is sending me $60.00 a week child support…

Please advise me…I do not have the money to take these men to court…at all…

Laura Trumbull…

Laura Trumbull