Cohabitation w/o legal seperation

In my own opinion it would not be a good idea to move in until you are divorced. Since you have no court ordered custody your STBX could always file for full custody and the courts would frown on you living with a man who is not your husband. I know it sounds silly in this day and age but you only have 8 months or less before you can file for divorce. I would not do anything to jeopardize any agreement you and your STBX have involving custody. It’s great that your son gets along so well with your new boyfriend but keep in mind that the separation is still a new situation to your son and he, like most children of divorce, is probably hoping that you and dad get back together. Even if he doesn’t voice this desire.
Get the agreement you do have in writing and have it notorized. If this is Mr. Right, then you it should be worth the wait. Again, only my opinion, but I wouldn’t rush into another relationship before the end of the current one.

Dear meadow04,

The only advice I can give you is to tell you what the law says, which is that adultery is a crime in North Carolina. Moving in with a man that is not your husband while you are still legally married would give the state strong evidence that you were committing adultery.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax


The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

If I have been seperated (from my STBX) for four months now, and living on my own for that time. I have meet someone great, and we are starting to spend alot of time together. When neither of us have our childeren, we either stay at his home or mine. He has asked me to move in with him and I am pondering the idea, however, I do not want to take any risk as far as my son or the joint custody that me and my ex share(which has been a mutual decision). My son and my friend get along great, as well as his daughter, me and my son. It feels so right. How does this work if I did move in with him? My son would have his own room, so there is no sharing rooms. According to a past topic I had sent in, I am considered seperated since I no longer live w/my STBX, however there has been no signing of a leagal document. I do not want any alimony from my STBX and he is refusing to pay any child support at this time. Please help… Thanks, Meadow04