I’ve read several of these topics, but I’m still not 100% clear. I know that seeing the person you had an affair with during your separation helps to corroborate that the affair took place during the marriage. I’m unclear on 2 related facts to this:
- What if you were forgiven in writing for the affair, where your spouse wanted very much to continue the marriage in spite of the affair taking place
AND
- You start dating your paramour during your separation period but AFTER October 1st when house bill 1110 comes into effect.
Does dating the paramour during separation “undo” the condonement?
I’m trying to figure out if I can date this person now or if I have to wait until I’m legally divorced (roughly 6 more months until I can file, then I guess 30-60 days after that until it is granted).
I believe there is an argument that could be made regarding the procurement of the condonation, therefore invalidating the same.
You may date this person now, however it could damage your case for alimony (or defending the same) based on the argument that the affair never really ceased. Further, your paramour can still be sued for Alienation of Affection or Criminal Conversation even after the divorce.
Thanks, Erin.
Can you elaborate on what you mean by the procurement of the condonment invalidating the same? I didn’t ask for a letter, stbx just sent me one as a plea for us to put the affair behind us and move on in our marraige. In the letter, he admits to being abusive, says that he still loves me and wants to continue our marriage in spite of the affair. It is a very long letter that says I am forgiven over and over.
Are you saying it cannot be used as forgiveness/condonement?
I mean that it can be alleged the affair was “discontinued” to ensure a forgiveness which would later be used as a defense. I am not saying this is what happened, just that it could be argued.