I do not know of any CS advance payments (my ex is 7700.00+ in arears because of his medical disability. But I would suggest, if you want set aside money in the future for prepayment, consiter putting it in a seperate checking account. Most simple accounts are free. You can deposit what you feel you need and then when the time comes to pay your ex, it will be right there and in the event of an emergency, you can “dip” into it without her permission. I think it is very pety of her to not bend a little to help you out when you obviously have the kid’s intrests at heart. I wish you luck and just remember, the pettiness will come back to the person being petty.
Good point about the separate checking acct. That would have avoided this issue, which means that I would not have been so angry about behavior that I know she always displays…I did not protect myself from her. But it is not easy to think every detail through with the same attention and clarity given to all matters in life. And knowing the financial mess I am in, I chose to place CS first without exception…to make it feel “final”. And that’s exactly how it turned out in a painful way (I guess it was of my own doing…).
This is not me defending myself but more a chance to elaborate on why I did what I did and I do want to know what she and I both did that could have gotten us in trouble with the courts (I can
Not a problem. One thing I thought about, in your agreement, does it give you a time frame in which to apy a bill once it is produced to you? Did y’all discuss the amount before hand? I am not one to take up for anybody who is flaking on their CS, but it seems to me that you are trying your best to keep the kids upfront. Her inabity to accomidate your request when you paid so far in advance looks like her way of controlling the situation. I would advise you to keep to the letter of the agreement. Sooner or later she will need something too. You can prove to be the bigger man by doing whats best for your kids. I do not know the ages of your kids, but as they get older they will see what she is doing. What alot of parents forget is that kids see everyting we do. It may not make a hill of beans right now, but when they are grown the amout of respect they hold for us will be determined by the little things we did in our lives. Love should be unconditional, but they might not like us very much if we are bitter and petty. Best way to not have this aregument with her in the future is protect yourself beforehand.
In the future I would not recommend paying child support in advance. Many things can come up that would require the modification of child support. You did the correct thing with regards to the medical expenses.
Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
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301 McCullough Drive
Charlotte, NC 28262
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I have been unemployed for over a year due to a health disability, which required me to leave work (Doctor