I really don’t know what to do about all this. I am about ready to have someone served to have a DNA done. Yes, it is the bio-father. He told me that if I ever did this, he would take my daughter away from me. After the test comes back, what would be the next step I would have to take? Do I run down to the court house and fill out paperwork to get custody of her? What if he says he wants her for a day? Do I tell him ‘No’? Do I have the right to do that until there is an order? He has not seen her in like 9 months. He has deneyed her since his ex wife and her family found out about her. I am scared, please help with some advice. Thank you.
If I understand this correctly, you have a child whose father is denying that he is the father due to his family situation? Since he is denying being the father, you are having dna testing court ordered and he has threatened that he would take her from you if you did this?
Since he is denying that she is his, you do not have to allow visitations. If that is the case, it is unlikely that he will get custody of her either. My suggestion is that once the test result come back, you file for child support. You have primary legal and physical custody at this point and there’s few instances where that would change. If the father would like to have visitations after this is settled, you should offer a reasonable schedule. He does not have to adhere to a visitation schedule but the schedule that you set up is entirely at your discretion with primary legal and physical custody. The courts would look on you in a better light if you do offer visitations to the father. If his family is angry and bitter about the situation, he may decide not to exercise the right for visitaitons at this time. But be prepared that things may change down the road. If he IS the father, he has visitation rights, but it is very unlikely that he would be able to take the child away.
Hopefully, the attorney can tell you the next step, but I don’t believe that you need to file for custody. I believe that would need to be something that the father would do if he chooses. I think that he’s using this as a scare tactic and the threat should be ignored, unless you are served. It’s unlikely that a father denying the child’s paternity would suddenly want to have custody, and if he did, it would be difficult to show in court why it is in the child’s best interest to leave the current arrangment alone.
Please try to remain calm. Once the dna test confirms that he is the father, you can file with DSS for child support.
If your daughter is the biological child of your ex you will need to file an action for custody to prevent your ex from attempting to take her. Until a court order outlining custody of a child both parents are equally entitled to have the child. If your ex is denying paternity he does not have legal rights to the child at this time, and you are within your rights to deny visitation.
You will need to file an action for child custody in order to protect your self moving forward. Once your ex is determined to be the father he will have rights to the child, however given his lack of involvement in her life I would presume he would be awarded visitation at best, with you remaining the primary custodian.
I understand. Should I file before the test is back? I know 100% that he is the father. I didn’t sleep with anyone else.
If you are positive he is the father I would recommend that you file immediately.
Would I need an attorney to do so? What type of paperwork would I need? How would I go about doing this?
p.s. Oh I am beyond 100% that she is his. I talked with him yesterday and he is still saying that he is not the father. Grrr that gets me mad!
I always recommend that litigants retain legal counsel to help guide them through the process. Each county has different rules and deadlines which can be difficult to navigate alone.
Many counties offer a self service center in which they have many of the forms you will need.
I suggest you schedule an initial consultation with an attorney to gain an understanding of the process and procedure in your specific county. Even if you do decided to go it alone, you will have an understanding of the specific time frames and scheduling procedures in your specific county.
Thank you. I live in onslow county. I guess if I go to base, maybe they can do the paperwork for me. I should be able to file that in the courts.
You may also want to try and speak to someone at Legal Aid in your county. They may be able to help.