Served with the DNA order


#1

It has come to my attention that he was served the order to have the DNA done. I know 100% he is the father. Some family members of his, have been telling me that I need to watch out, that I should get a wapon or something. I told them I don’t need or want that stuff in my home.

She is now 16 months old, and he hasn’t seen her for almost a year. (his doing.) He has until March 10th to have the test done, or it goes to court. I am worried. I know the judge is going to tell him to take it, not worried about that.

When the test comes back proven he is the father, what is the next step? I know support, he has to pay, but I’m talking about her in general. I don’t want him around her because he threathened her life with his ex mother in law, almost a year ago. Yes, a police report was done.

To this date he still claims she is not his. He knows she is. I told him, when I first found out I was pgnt. He wanted me to get an abortion and even made the appt. I couldn’t do it, again my beliefs. He was around the whole pngcy and even went to a few appts. He was there at the hospital after she was born, bought her things like diapers, a few outfits, etc up to June of 2008. Now he has totally blown her off and claims she isn’t his to protect his money values with his EX MOTHER in law, and his career. He is a CWO4 in the USMC. He was still married when I got pgnt with my daughter.

I have tried over and over again to talk to him. He won’t talk to me at all. My daughter is sick with a blood disorder, for both of us are a carrier for Thalamessia. I told him that if he gave the Dr his blood then I wouldn’t be going this route. He wouldn’t do it, so we are taking the route of the law.

(I had my husband at the time of birth removed from her birth certificate through the courts. Yes DNA was done. He wasn’t the father, at which we both knew that. But, it was the first step we had to take to get started on the Bio-father. )

I was told by the natural fathers’ ex-wife, that he is going to walk into court and say that, all this was new to him. That he never knew she was his. (Of course all that is a lie.) He thinks that it is going to help and safe him. I for one don’t understand that at all why a man would do that.

This is what I’m trying to get out.

I want to take full custody of her. I can’t afford anymore attoneys. Can I do this on my own? What would my outcome be? His ex wife is more than willing to stand beside me 100%. She knows of everything he has said, done, and how he is with his other 3 children. (They are in their teens of course). I want to make sure he doesn’t have a chance of hurting this little girl. He is going to get really upset that he has to pay childsupport when all this is done and over with.

I am one scard person. I heart the way he talked when we were together. The people he said he knows, what type of phone call he can make to have something happen. I moved to the other side of town into a new town. Didn’t want him to know where I lived. He now knows because I saw him driving past. My house isn’t even in the google address or gps’s yet. It is so brand new. The sub division was just build as well as my home. I even have a new vehicle. I don’t even go to the place’s I use to go. But, he still found me.

I need some really good advice on what to do. I told his ex, I can’t get a RTO because he hasn’t done anything to me or said anything to me in a long time. Please help!

Sorry for being so long. Thank you.


#2

I’m not sure about NC, but if you go through state agencies for child support they’ll handle everything. I had to sue my son’s father for child support and they took care of the DNA test. (p.s. He had a friend get an ID card with his name on it and sent him to take the test) Be careful. Make sure they take his picture when he takes the test and you verify it was actually him. You might even need to do this for the test your husband took.

If you can’t afford a lawyer, than that’s my suggestion.


#3

Once the DNA test proves he is the father, you need to file an action for child custody and child support. You will need to present evidence in court related to his threats of violence, and your fears about him being around the child.
If this man is claiming the child is not his, it may be that he simply does not want visitation and a custody suit will not affect that. A court will not force him to spend time with the child.
There are self serve centers in many counties which are set up to help people pursue these types of actions on their own. You may also want to contact the legal aid office in your county for assistance getting started.
You should go to DSS to pursue child support once he is determined by the court to be the father.


#4

It is going through the child support division. But they don’t handle custody issue’s. I just want this taken care of and him away from her. I really fear on what may go on. Thank you for your help.