Custody Trial


#1
  1. What does your husband want and can you reach any sort of agreement without involving lawyers?
  2. Why does your son need to live out of a bag? Why not keep changes of clothing at both homes?
  3. How far apart do you live? Will your son be able to attend the same school and live at both homes?
  4. Can you compromise in anyway? For example, can he stay with your ex over more of the summer in addition to the time he has now? Can he stay for school holidays? Will your ex go for that?
    FYI - Custody battles will involve a lawyer. If he files for a modification of custody your first step will be to go through counseling or court ordered mediation long before it ever goes to trial so it is in your interest to try and work this out.

#2

I guess I have another question…
Why are you “…hopeless, helpless and fearful…”. You haven’t said that your husband abused you or your child. Your child will still love you and may appreciate more your ability to let go and let him have this time with his father. If you and your ex were still together they would have time together.


#3

Be sure you understand how many days he can have overnight visitations with your son before he is considered to have him the majority of the time. In MD, if the children spend a certain amount of time at one or the other parents home, it will affect child support and create result in a reduction.


#4

Hey mal, thanks for responding. The separation agreement was the “compromise”. It was AGREED upon then and was set for the term of our co-parenting. I think it is already fair enough. He does have clothes at both homes but that wasn’t really my point. I believe a child needs a primary home. He shouldn’t have agreed to the terms in the beginning and want to change it. There is also alot of resentment on my part, because he left us for his assistant at work. She left her husband for him and has a 10 year old son as well. She is behind this trying to get my son on her son’s schedule. My ex and I were very amicable and had a very healthy coparenting relationship until her involvement. I do not feel I need to budgue so I guess the courts will have to decide.

I feel hopeless and helpless because he has more money than I do and can get better lawyers than I can.

I feel fearful that I’m going to lose even more of my son’s upbringing.

quote:
[i]Originally posted by mal[/i] [br]1. What does your husband want and can you reach any sort of agreement without involving lawyers? 2. Why does your son need to live out of a bag? Why not keep changes of clothing at both homes? 3. How far apart do you live? Will your son be able to attend the same school and live at both homes? 4. Can you compromise in anyway? For example, can he stay with your ex over more of the summer in addition to the time he has now? Can he stay for school holidays? Will your ex go for that? FYI - Custody battles will involve a lawyer. If he files for a modification of custody your first step will be to go through counseling or court ordered mediation long before it ever goes to trial so it is in your interest to try and work this out.

Concerned Parent


#5

Ahhh… thank you very much. I have been anxiously awaiting some legal advice. So far I haven’t had much support. thank you so much. I’m seeking counsel tomorrow and I will bring that up.

quote:
[i]Originally posted by Concerned Parent[/i] [br]My ex husband is bucking our sep. agreement wanting more time. He already has the typicl arrangement: every other week-end, wed. nights and every other holiday, etc... full invitation to come on over at anytime to see his son. I want to encourage a healthy relationship with the 2 of them. However, I think his new request for even more time is unfair to me. I need a healthy relationship with my son as well. I also want structure and consistancy during the school week. I think 1 night a week is healthy. He doesn't need to be living out of a bag and moving around constantly.

My question is this: “Does is make difference to a judge which parent initiates the custody trial?”

I’m wondering if I should make the first move or just sit back and wait for my ex too? Money is an issue for both of us. We just declared bankruptsy, but he makes a ton more money than I do and has a family and girlfriend with money. I feel hopeless, helpless and fearful… What should I expect?

Concerned Parent


Concerned Parent


#6

Dear Concerned Parent:

Greetings. If you just declared bankruptcy and it is not discharged yet, it is unlikely that either of you can initiate a lawsuit because of the automatic stay.

If you like the situation as it stands now, why would you do anything? Good luck.

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

301 McCullough Drive Suite 510
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax

ROSEN.COM

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.


#7

My ex husband is bucking our sep. agreement wanting more time. He already has the typicl arrangement: every other week-end, wed. nights and every other holiday, etc… full invitation to come on over at anytime to see his son. I want to encourage a healthy relationship with the 2 of them. However, I think his new request for even more time is unfair to me. I need a healthy relationship with my son as well. I also want structure and consistancy during the school week. I think 1 night a week is healthy. He doesn’t need to be living out of a bag and moving around constantly.

My question is this: “Does is make difference to a judge which parent initiates the custody trial?”

I’m wondering if I should make the first move or just sit back and wait for my ex too? Money is an issue for both of us. We just declared bankruptsy, but he makes a ton more money than I do and has a family and girlfriend with money. I feel hopeless, helpless and fearful… What should I expect?

Concerned Parent