He's acting really nice to me after I asked for a divorce

I made myself clear to my husband I want a divorce after 3.5 years of making excuses for his avoidance of not sponsoring my residancy papers so I could get my social security number and go out to work as I’m british and he’s american and we’re living in his coutry. I’m educated and have qualifications in business studies. He’s also been verbally abusive towards me in front of my children. My children don’t know this kind of behavior and I can’t accept this.

I’ve shown him endless patience but nothing has worked. He’s agreed to the divorce. The confusing part here is he has been going out of his way to behave better towards me than he has ever shown. Very conciencious and courtesious checking in to see if he has upset me. Kissing my hand and saying things like all I want is peace. He comes over to give me a hug and asks if I want to watch a movie with him or would I like him to cook dinner. I felt sorry for him the other day and gave him a hug as he had tears in his eyes. I thought to myself maybe he dosen’t want to divorce because he’s been so nice. No matter what I need he’s happy to oblidge. It’s been three weeks now and he’s still super nice and acting well out of character but he’s agreed to the divorce.

I had a death in my extended family a few days ago, I was knocked sideways. I didn’t know where to place my emotions. My husband seemed to care and said all the right things to show he cared yet that night I went over to him and told him I was grieving and needed a hug, all he did was pat me on the back very coldly showing no concern for my feelings. I’m confused

Your need to think about what you want. If you feel you can make it work insist that you and your husband go to counseling. This may work out. If not, get your ducks in a row and proceed with the divorce. No man has the right to abuse you in any way, shape, or form. I have been going through the verbal abuse, and it hurts worse than the physical abuse. God Bless You.