How do I move out? What can I take?


#1

I want to separate from my husband. How do I legally go about moving out? Is he served any type of separation notice? Do I have to tell him the day I’m moving out? I’m quite worried because my husband is very anal about possessions and I know if he is aware that I’m moving out he is going to be breating down my throat telling me “YOU CAN’T TAKE THAT”

We have been married since 2008 and all the items in our home were either purchased jointly or were given as gifts.


#2

You can move out any time you want to. You can do it when he’s home, or when he’s away. The fact that you will be moving out of the marital residence with the intention of not returning nor resuming the marital relationship is enough to make you separated in NC. It is better to try and draft a separation agreement before you leave, to make issues easier to handle, but that is not always possible.


#3

I am not an attorney

As far as what to take, my personal opinion is to take everything that you want to retain. Anything you leave behind, good luck getting it after the fact. When I left my ex, I had a U-Haul pulled up to the house not 30 minutes after he left for work, and we were packed up and gone before he got home from work. I took everything that was my separate property, all of my child’s furniture, our clothes, I took the marital property that I wanted to keep, and left the stuff that I knew he would want/I didn’t want. I even took dry food that I bought specifically for me and my child, and left the food that was specifically bought for him.

What I had been told by the lawyer that I consulted with before leaving is that it is always easier for me (you) to hand over something that you took that you ‘concede’ in mediation or are ordered to return versus trying to get the ex to give you something that you really want, but left behind. Possession really does seem to be 9/10 of the law…

And, btw, I did not have to give my ex a single thing I took from the home…