I have been married for almost 9 years. My husband has been drinking heavily for almost 8 years and I am finally tired of trying to make this marriage work. He is verbally abusive (often in front of the kids and others), he stays out until all times of the night, and can be very physical when drunk. I’ve never been technically hit but I’ve been pushed, shoved, awaken out of my sleep by being hit with a pillow sham, etc. He was fired from his job of almost 10 years and is now working through a temp agency. However, since acquiring this job, he has yet to assist with any of the bills, sighting that he is only making minimum wage. He has received three DWI’s and undergone mandated treatment/weekend jail but no significant change in his habits. The mortgage is in my name so I can’t risk leaving and ruining my credit. I consulted an attorney about Divorce from Bed and Board and was told that it is basically a waste of money because the judge’s decision is not really enforced…I have very little money let alone money to waste on a procedure that will not benefit me. I’ve allowed utilities to be turned off in an attempt to make him assist with the expenses but that is ultimately not beneficial to my children. I don’t know what options I have at this point but to endure this disrespect. I need answers
I’ve never heard of an order for divorce from bed and board not being enforced, but the way law is practiced varies from county to county. If you are unable to use the court to assist with his removal, you should consider presenting him with a separation agreement and attempting to negotiate for him to leave. Either way, it sounds like you should consult with at least one other attorney in your area for more guidance in what remedies you have available to you by law.
Thank you Ms. Putiri! I may have spoken incorrectly. What I understand is that it is almost impossible to be granted Divorce From Bed and Board unless there is something drastic going on in the household like he’s running a Meth lab or something on those terms. Judges here in Meck County will not grant it just because he’s drinking and making life intolerable. If I allow my home to go into forclosure, I could loose my job since I work at a bank.
You’re welcome. If you cannot get a divorce from bed and board granted, the other option would be to move out and immediately proceed with a claim for equitable distribution and file a motion for interim distribution of the house so that you can get back in the house and make sure the payments are made.