Illicit sexual behavior

You can’t sue your husband for AofA…only his girlfriend.
I guess you could go after him for adultry, but that is rarely prosecuted and is actually looked down upon in courts as is AofA and CC. This is what I’ve been told by my attorney.

If you are a dependent spouse, you are eligible for alimony.
Adultry MAY play into you getting it, but you wont get MORE because he cheated.

Reminder: you need to have a confession or hard evidence of sexual misconduct to prove CC. One receipt isn’t really hard evidence. Think long and hard before you enter into that type of litigation. It is expensive and emotional.

That will need to be one for the attorneys I believe. In my opinion, the first day that you started living separate and apart is the date of separation. If you were allowing him to come back to the marital home, shower, keep his clothing there, eat and help out with the children then it sounds as though you had an amicable separation but I believe that a lawyer would argue that it was still separation…

If the support spouse (the spouse who makes more money) engages in a sexual relationship outside the marriage they will be ordered to pay alimony. So yes, any evidence you have that a sexual relationship existed before you separated will help your alimony case. If you have evidence that he talked to this woman before the separation and that a sexual relationship existed shortly after the separation, the court will likely draw the inference that the relationship existed before the separation.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax


The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

Does the illicit sexual behavior and date of separation matter in regards to getting alimony. Husband says he separated first and then started his sexual affair (the next day- we have the hotel receipt). But I know the truth. He never officially left the house until the next week. He came home after work and ate dinner, showered, then went to a hotel but came back in the morning and made the kids breakfast and fed the animals. Sounds like he still lived at the house, but did not sleep there. Also he said at the PSS hearing that “I kicked him out”. I should have, but he actually left on his own accord. Husband is being sued for AOA. Will his DOS be significant in that case?