copy all the statements,organized,organized, organized, I say again organized… look at all your assets, catorgorize them, set you realistic demands, write them down and get a good lawyer good lawyer once you set your demands don’t pay her credit card debt and don’t use them or yours start a savings fund for the child in the child names with a realistic amount and save every reciept you pay cash for the child copy them and make a folder organized again and catagorized keep this going. Don’t ever sign anything and again get a lawyer. Force the custody issue before anything with child support comes alimony and that is what hurts along with the debt. BEST BET BE ORGANIZED AND DON’T PAY UNTIL YOUR ORDERED TO BY THE COURT Been here done this … GOOD LUCK
Disbelief in the system
Do I have a shot a custody in my situation. Do I hurt my chances for everything if I leave versus her? Keep the advice coming.
I do believe that men have as much of a chance at getting custody as women do. I have seen it. I believe that with her mental illness there is a very good chance. But one thing to consider, be VERY careful that she gets an attorney to check out any legal paperwork. My husband’s ex (also bi-polar) tried to get their original separation papers voided saying that she was on anti-depressants at the time and did not have legal counsel on the agreement she signed. She said that she didn’t understand what she was signing due to taking the medication. We had overwhelming evidence that she made other life altering decisions (had her tubes tied for birth control method) within weeks of signing the agreement. Also, since she was still on his medical insurance, we have record that the medication was never filled. Ignorance of the law is no defense, but if they are on any kind of medication or depressed, an attorney can use the defense that they were in no state of mind to make such decisions.
Definitely get organized and keep a journal. Write down every incident, write down days children stay with you or with her, write down everything. IMO, you have an even better shot if she is the one that leaves the marital home, for custody and everything else. Get a good attorney and stay steady for yourself and your son.
Here is the story. My wife is bi-polar and her device when she is in a bad swing is shopping. She currently has run up $50,000.00 in credit card debt. We have just started counseling, and she turned over her credit cards to me. As I expected, she is still using them almost daily. I cannot continue to live like this, and at this point want out. We have a 3-1/2 year old son. What are the steps I should take? I don’t want to live this way anymore, but I also don’t want to make stupid mistakes because of emotions getting in the way. I want to make the decisions that, in the end, are for my best interest. The credit card debt is totally in her name, not mine, and I can provide statement copies to prove that this money is not being spent on necessary items. Please give me feedback, and thank you in advance.