Legal Separation


My husband was sent legal separation papers 3 weeks ago which he has’nt acknowleged getting them yet. He hired a lawyer and she contacted my lawyer, nothing has been discussed or agreed on yet. She sent a counter claim and after that we will sue. I had a house before marriage and he has land that we paid taxes on. We’ve been married 16 years. We built a new house 2 years ago using my retirement savings of 80,000 to purchase house,paid bills off, paid his college bill, furniture, etc. I was all for dividing until he he kept telling me he would get half of everything own. (he never saved for his future). And the fact he makes waay more money than me. I was working the entire marriage until I got laid off in Feb. of 09’. He makes 60,000 a year. He wants the new house valued at 287,000 and I keep my 95,000 house, does’nt want to give my share on the land and does’nt want to pay alimony. I’ve invested all of my savings and since I lost my job he says it’s not his problem. We’ve asked for the new house and post separation payment and alimony. Will be considering divorce from bed and board since he won’t leave. He has been emotionally abusive all these years, a sexless marriage for the past 15 years and 5 of his friends (Male) are said to be gay. He spent 500.00 to talk to them on the phone, they buy his shirts that cost 145.00, he tells them I love you each time they talk on the phone for hours, he kisses one of them on the face. I talked to co worker (male) about this and when he got the phone bill he said I talked to him too much. (for 2 months) 1 minute or 2 the most at 19 mins on the phone discussing him. Now the wants to say I am involved with him to use against me. All he has is a copy of those phone bills. I hired a P.I. but he fell sick. What are my chances of keeping this house? The other one is leased out with a option to buy. What are the chances on the calls being used against me as for as alimony and post separation. I have some statements and information on him and his gay friends so what are my chances on the bed and board divorce. He has also threaten to kill me. I have a very good lawyer but not knowing is very hard since I lost my job and I don’t know how I’m going to make it. Thanks


If you want the home, and can afford to maintain the monthly payments (with support) I see no reason why you would not be awarded the home, however if your husband wants the home too, a judge will have to decide. I cannot predict what any judge would do in this situation.
As for the calls to your friend, your husband can use the calls in an attempt to prove you had a sexual relationship with this man, however a few phone calls are not nearly enough to bar your alimony claim. Your husband would have to prove you were actually involved in a sexual relationship with this man, proving that you had the inclination and opportunity to engage in sexual intercourse with this person.
If your husband has threatened to kill you, forget the divorce from bed and board and get a domestic violence protective order, and ask that the home be awarded to you. You need to ensure your safety, and he sounds very unstable.


He threatened to kill me September 3, 2008, but continues to be emotionally abusive and controlling. With all his behaviors mentioned before, recently i found a very sharp knife that is not ours in his nightstand drawer (we sleep in separate rooms now). Then last week he sent me a very strange email he’d written sort of a story of our marriage. It stated that he was in love with someone else he named (Dew) which I take can be male or female. At the end of the story he came home to tell the wife (me) he did’nt want the divorce, but she was in bed…DEAD. I called my lawyer and sent her a copy and talked to an advocate. It looks like he admitted his affair with this person. They both said it’s my decision on the protective order, nobody knows what the judge will say, but i do have grounds. Does the threat expire? What are my chances based on this information? If the judge sides with him he will be allowed to return home and I will have to live with him and that will make me even more afaid and uncomfortable. Can all of this information be use in court for a divorce from bed and board?


Threats do not expire, however the weight of such evidence will be lessened over time, another fact is that even though he threatened to kill you, you continued to live in the home with him, leading to the inference that you may not have a true fear.
Yes, this information can be used in an action for divorce from bed and board.