I am in a destructive marriage marked by addiction and domestic violence and am trying to better understand my separation options.
I understand we have to live separately for 12 months before filing. What kind of proof would I need to show that we have lived separately?
If we separate, I want to take my children out of state to be closer to relatives and church family. How could I most safely go about that? I understand I need his written consent for custody. Does that consent need to be on a legal document, or just a separation agreement we draw up between ourselves? If he balks at giving consent, what recourse do I have?
Is he under any obligation to provide child support during separation? I work part-time from home, he brings in the bulk of our family income, and it would be very challenging to support our four children and myself on my income alone.
I never imagined I’d be in this sitation and am completely ignorant about all things separation and divorce. Thank you for anything you can share to provide some clarity at a really dark time.
(1) Unless the date of separation is contested by your spouse, there is nothing you need to produce to prove the date of separation. Your truthful testimony under oath will suffice.
(2) It would be best to have a separation agreement with custody terms or a custody court order to allow you to move out of state with the children without risking the other parent filing for emergency custody based on your attempt to remove them from the State of NC.
If he does not agree, then you will need to file a custody lawsuit and have a hearing/trial before a judge for the judge to determine custody.
(3) You may be entitled to child support depending on each of your monthly gross incomes and the custody schedule.
You can use our Child Support Calculator to see what child support might look like in your situation.
You may find our free Divorce Legal Webinar to be very helpful as you being the separation process. This webinar discusses all areas of a separation and divorce, including custody, financial issues, and property division. These are presented live a few times a month.
Anna Ayscue
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh • Wake Forest
Rosen Online | Unlimited confidential access to a North Carolina attorney for $199/mo - click here
The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.