Qualify for alimony?

I want to proceed with a divorce, – I haven’t discussed this yet with my husband and want to be as well-informed as possible before doing so.

I want to divorce for these reasons: 1) verbal abuse (angers/yells very frequently); 2) lack of any physical intimacy, including lack of hugging, cuddling, etc… These 2 reasons have been present for most or all of the marriage.

We’ve been married for 14 years, I am 56, my husband is 57, no children.

I worked full-time for the first ~5-6 years of our marriage; my salary was about 1/2 - 2/3 of his then. I quit full-time work and began working as a part-time freelancer in the IT (computer) field, and have been doing this for the past 8-9 years. There were two primary reasons for doing this: (1) he wanted to travel during his sabbaticals and have me accompany him (I can do my work from anywhere); and (2) we wanted to enable me to reduce the stresses on him, and to reduce the stresses on me - enabling me to better cope with him.

During the period that I’ve worked PT freelance, I have taken care of everything inside and outside the home.

After selling our home and splitting the proceeds, I will probably be able to pay cash for a small home. My income varies from year to year, I may have some difficulty covering my minimal living costs at times. With my age and this economy, I would have a hard time finding full-time employment in my field.

Do you think I would qualify for some alimony for the next 7 years? (half the length of marriage)

I would also like some assistance with my health insurance. Would I have good grounds to ask that he cover me under COBRA for 3 years after the divorce?

Thank you!

I believe you do have an actionable alimony claim. With respect to the whether your position is reasonable or not will depend on the cost of COBRA, and in any event the coverage is limited to 18 months.

Actually, COBRA is 36 months for a dependent, 18 months for the employee (I am a dependent).

Thanks much!