Yes, you are still separated because you have not resumed your marital relationship. Even the occasional physical resumption of a relationship would not mean that you have reconciled.
The restraining order may be a different story and would depend on what it states. If he is not to be within so many feet/yards from your residence, work or from your person then you are violating the order. I do not know if you can rescend it or not.
If it’s just a restraining order for threats and harassment, then I would say it would be a matter of what type of harassment was being focused on when you got the order and if that is still occuring. It would be easier not to have him around you at all so there is no chance for threats or harassment, but I can see how with your situation that is not possible. Read over the order again and see what it states…
This would likely be considered separation for the purpose of obtaining a divorce. However, if the order requires him to stay away from the marital residence he is violating the order by being there. You are not in violation of the order, but you cannot give him permission to violate it.
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I was granted a restraining order against my husband in Feb’08.He is not to threaten or harass me and I have custody of the children, and primary dwelling. We have 2 small children that need joint parental support for school schedules/ daycare pick ups etc. and it was acknowledged that we must have communication for the sake of the children. He has not secured an apartment yet and it is November. He bounces from hotel, to friend’s house. Since July, I know he comes by the house and stays during the day and keeps the children in a safe environment after school…etc. while I am at work. He leaves immediately when I come home. Even though unspoken I am allowing this for the safety of my children. His situation is too unstable. I wouldn’t be able to work (as I am the sole bread winner for them) if he didn’t help with his children. He has spent the night maybe a total of 5 times to care for the children when I have needed to go out of town, but he has never spent the night when I am there. Am I breaking the restraining order, and would this still be counted as a separation?