Teaching kids to call girlfriend


#1

concernmom2005 -

Just because you are not living as a “family” anymore does not mean you can not attend family counseling.

You need a professional to explain to your ex that this is damaging to your children. When divorced parents start a new relationship the children should not be introduced into it until there is a certain future to the relationship.

Children do not need to see a string on other men and women floating through their lives.

As far as calling this new girlfriend mama I just don’t agree with it. She is not their mother, you are. The fact that they are not married certainly would lead me to belive that she does not deserve a title other then her name. Does your ex plan on marrying this person.

The best you can do is teach your children to be respectful. Do not let them see any negative feelings that you may have for him or her. Although he may no longer be your husband he is their father and you need to find a way to deal with all involved.

If your ex does not agree to family counseling then you should at least attend with your children.

Best wishes [:I]
MP


#2
quote:
Originally posted by concernmom2005
hello everyone, question my ex is teahing the kids to call his new girlfriend mama. how do i go about stoppong that before it gets to far. they only have one mama. thanks for any advise

#3

thanks for the advice. he plans on marrying her someday i guess. the kids are under 4 years old so it’s hard enough to explain something to them at that age. he teaching them to call her mama just to get back at me and make me mad which he claims he’s not doing.


#4

The fact that they are so young is a good reason for counseling. There are professionals who specialize in children. You might also want to your attorney. Perhaps you will need some guidelines set up concerning the childrens lives and some control on who they interact with.

My best advice for you would be to try to keep it clean on your end. It eventually gets hard to fight with somebody who doesn’t fight back.
Although it is hard try to be the bigger person and pick your battles wisely.

Good luck
MP


#5

I think it is grossly irresponsible for him to try to coach them into calling her that. But I don’t agree with forbidding it.

I am the product of several divorces. My stepfather, who has been so for the last twenty years, is my dad. He loves me unconditionally. My father, he’s dad too. So I have two dads–both have proven themselves to me. However, I know my lineage belongs with my paternal father and I give him that respect.

Mom is an earned title, and you might find that your kids will end up calling her that–and it will hurt like hell–but everyone loves an underdog, and if she really is nice to them and shows them love, they might just resent the fact you are saying mean things about her and end up taking up for her.


#6

hello everyone,
question my ex is teahing the kids to call his new girlfriend mama. how do i go about stoppong that before it gets to far. they only have one mama. thanks for any advise