Greetings. No, that is not abandonning the marriage and even if you did abandon the marriage that does not give her the right to take everything. So, no and no to questions #1 and #2.
Yes, the house is separate property if purchased solely by you prior to the marriage and you never gifted it back to the marriage by making it jointly titled. However, the equity which you acquired in the house due to mortgage payments made during the marriage may be divisible and marital property which you would have to split with her. Good luck.
Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax
301 McCullough Drive Suite 510
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax
1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax
The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.