My husband and I were married for 4 years. Although our marriage was less than perfect, I continued to work on it. I thought we had a typical marriage with bills, and issues with each other that we needed to work through like any other couple. That was until I happened upon his Facebook page and noticed that he was talking to several women…also checking his email account and seeing that he had been on several dating sites for a while. That very day…I packed a few clothes and went to stay at a hotel to get my head together. After I left, he changed the locks on the door and I no longer had access to my home or my belongings. I contacted the landlord by email and phone to let him know that I was locked out and did not receive a response.
After a week, my husband had moved in his cousin, a friend of his son’s and a woman. I was told by people that know these people, that they were locked up in the house doing drugs. After several attempts to try to get my husband to respond to my phone calls I left a message that I was going to call the sheriff to come with me as a civil stand by while I retrieved my belongings. Only then did my husband call me and say that he had paid for everything that we aquired and I could get my belongings after he left.
My husband left on Christmas day to move in with a wealthy woman in California. I was able to go into the house with the landlord and the house was destroyed!!! All of my belongings were gone…clothes, jewelry, tv’s, etc…the landlord said that he had been to the house earlier because my husband had not paid the rent for 3 months and in passing mentioned that the house had been robbed. He told the landlord that the washer and dryer and stove that belonged to the landlord had been stolen along with all of out televisions and my clothing. The landlord asked him if he had called the police and he said yes but they did not fill out a report. The landlord said that was not true so he met the sheriff at the house to make a report. The officer told the landlord that my husband was lying…he had sold the property…probably for drugs… beings that their were items about the house that indicated the property was being used as a crack house.
When I went into the home…my clothing and personal items were gone…I was left with all of the debt of rent unpaid (since the landlord would not release me from the lease) an outrageously high cable bill in which porn movies were “purchased”, electric bill and other debt from our marriage that he walked away from.
This man left on Christmas Day and moved in with a woman in Westlake Village, CA into a large home. She has leased him a Mercedes and he is working as a security guard. I have since found out so much about him such as this is his pattern with women…he will use them to get what he needs…but always turns to drugs and seeks out someone else.
I sent the woman a message trying to warn her about him so that she would not incur the same fate or heartache as myself and many others before me…but she laughed and has warned me of defamation of character. She has called me a vindictive redneck and has even sent messages to his adult daughter saying threatening things because his daughter told her how her father is.
I am at a loss as to what to do. I had to move in with my parents and am now working towards going to school to get a job that pays enough for me to be on my own. I have no vehicle…nothing!!
I was called by the girlfriend’s sister who told me that she is crazy (I guess misery loves company) and that she has money because of her ex-husband who is an executive producer with a major production company in LA and he is out of the country making a new Avatar movie.
I do not know where to turn or what to do…I am on the hook for debt and money we borrowed and he is off living the life in LA!! HELP!!
You will need to file a court action for equitable distribution, divorce from bed and board, and possibly alimony. A court action can help better distribute the debt.
Your husband is responsible for one-half of the marital debt, plus it was wrongful for him to sell or otherwise dispose of the marital property. It was also wrongful for him to change the locks to the house.
For more information on divorce from bed and board, check out our detailed article What is a Divorce From Bed and Board?
Anna Ayscue
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh • Wake Forest
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