Volatile situation


Our family has found itself in the midst of an outrageous situation concerning the divorce of my in-laws. I will briefly outline the situation, as follows.

The parents of my husband have decided to divorce. They are both in their upper sixties, one is ill with emphysema. They both have assets. The wife has stock options from an inheritance from her parents, that are solely hers. The worth of which I will not post, however, it is fairly substantial.

The problem:
The husband claimed he wanted to divorce. My mother-in-law wishes to move near her son, we live several states away. My husband made an appointment with an attorney in the town where the in-laws live, and got on a plane to assist his mother during the process.(She no longer drives.)
Upon his arrival, the situation has become quite volatile. He has only been there for twelve hours! The husband claims to know nothing about my husband going there to assist his mother. I personnally spoke to him myself and he most definately stated he wished to divorce and asked when my husband’s flight was arriving. Worse yet, his behavior is extremely out of line; my husband says it takes all of his strength to keep from “punching him.” I believe the husband is deliberately pushing my husband’s buttons in order to have him removed and legally banned from the premises. If this were to occur, his mother will have noone there on her behalf. The illness has somewhat clouded her mentation at times and she definately needs someone to mentor for her.
The question:
If the wife leaves the state without any legal seperation or divorce is this considered abandonment?
How should she now proceed, since her husband is obviously not going to cooperate as he originally said he would?


The wife can leave, and will not be considered to have abandoned the marriage, especially if she is leaving to ensure she is safe. I suggest she see a lawyer, pack her personal belongings, and anything with sentimental value, move out and the lawyer file suit for Equitable Distribution on her behalf.


Thank you so much for the advise. My husband was able to get her in to see an attorney first thing yesterday morning. Your response to my questions prompted him to not wait for the original appointment on Monday.

The attorney concurred with what you suggested. We are now in the process of getting her out of there. The husband is quite ired and threatening to have her committed, which is completely unrealistic and quite impossible.

Again, many,many, thanks-had I not contacted you, things may have been quite different.


I am glad to hear action is being taken to protect your mother in law. I wish you all the very best.