Adultery vs. rape

If you are still legally married, have not obtained absolute divorce, then you have committed adultery, which is illegal. Your husband could sue him for Alienation of Affection if you have not separated yet and he can show that you had a viable marriage. You can not sue your husband for that. Alienation of Affection means that a 3rd party to the marriage had an affect on either your or your spouses feelings of the other. Your husband could say that you have never discussed separating or divorce with him and that he thought that things were fine. It may be a lie but if you are still living together as married regardless of whether or not you are engaging in sexual relations with him then you are still married. Also, since you are still married, and if you have not separated the baby will legally be your husbands.
I do not know if the courts acknowledge rape in a marriage. My thoughts would be that you would have helped this situation more had you moved out right after the incident occured with the intention of divorce.

First, I am sorry to hear about the terrible ordeal that happened to you. I hope that you are seeking counseling to help you deal with being raped. Your Husband’s behavior is in no way acceptable.

Alienation of Affection means that a third party got involved in your marriage and alienated your spouses affections from your, in this case it appears that your affections were alienated long before this third party became involved. Your husband could still sue this third party for Alienation, but it is not likely he would be successful.

You cannot sue your Husband for alienation of affection, however you may be able to sue him for marital rape. I do not practice Tort law, you would need to consult with an attorney who did to find out if you have any civil causes of action against your Husband.

I wish you the best of luck.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
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The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

Last summer, my husband raped me while I was intoxicated (I drink 1-2 times a year). I did not report it because of the troubles it could cause for my son. Since that time, we have ceased all marital relations. Months ago,did decided to divorce but did not begin proceedings because I was in school and not working. Neither one of us wanted to risk problems for our son since, by agreement, I would be the one in custody.
About a month ago, I engaged in activity with another man. I am now pregnant. He worries that my husband will sue him for alienation of affection. I have been told that I could also sue my husband for the same thing, but I do not know if this is true.
How do I go about starting our separation, telling him about the pregnancy and avoiding any legal problems that may arise? is More than anything, I want to avoid as much trauma for my four year old as possible.