Advice


#1

Dear hugheske:

Greetings. My advice will depend on what “everything” means. What were you going to give her specifically?

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney at Law
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
NCDivorce.com
919-787-6668

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.


#2

I was going to give her the house with all of the equity, everything in the house except for my tools, a $976.00 a month child support (which I know is not negotiable) a $15,000 settlement payable as $500.00 a month for 30 months. I am also taking on all of the marital debt except for her truck payment. She has agreed to waive her rights to my military retirement (which at this point I relly dont care one way or the other) Basically I am leaving with my clothes, a car, and all of the bills. I cant afford to get a place of my own so I live in the barracks right now until some of the bills are paid off. I was willing to do all of this mainly to not upset the standard of living for my kids, but I am starting to feel that she doesnt deserve some of the luxeries she is enjoying at this point. thank you


#3

Dear hugheske:

Greetings. WHOA, slow down pony. Don’t make a rash decision because you are hurt by this situation. Instead, think this through. Pay her the child support, but hold her responsible for half of the bills. Give her the house, but ensure that she refinances it and gives you your share of the equity. If you want to put those funds in an account for your children, then do so at that time.

Do not make a decision out of wanting to avoid the conflict. You need to watch out for yourself too.

People make mistakes. Generally, the mistakes are messy, sloppy, and harmful, but they are still MISTAKES. Take care of your future so that you can take care of the children’s future. Give her what the law allows and little more, keeping your dignity and sanity along with half of your estate. Best of luck and KEEP YOUR HEAD UP!

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney at Law
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
NCDivorce.com
919-787-6668

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.


#4

Here’s my situation…about 3 years ago I confessed to my spouse that I had been involved in some sexual encounters. We went to counseling and worked things out at that point and stayed together, continued to have sexual relations and I stopped doing what I was doing all together and did everything she wanted me to do. During that period we made plans to buy a new house, I bought her a new SUV, new diamonds everything…and I became the husband that I thought she wanted. She would even tell me things like “thank you for being my partner” and she would tell me she loved me every day. Now in mid April I went on a vacation with my kids…she could not go because of work (so she said). when I got back she was different…about 2 days later I asked her how we were doing…she then told me she waqsnt sure if she loved me anymore and needed time apart. I asked her if there was someone else and she said no, that she didnt have any room for a relationship of any kind right now. I agreed to seperate so we could work things out. About a week later she said it was over. A week after that she wanted a seperation agreement to protect us in case someone else came along…a week after that she said “there might be someone else and you will have to deal with it” Last night she told me she was seeing someone, but just met him 3 weeks ago. I asked her if she had known him before we seperated and she said no…I just met him after we seperated. Today I looked up our cell phone bill and saw some numers she had called while I was on vacation with the kids. I called the number and it was the guy that she is seeing now…who is currently seperated from his wife. I talked to him for a bit, and he was under the inpression that she was seperated from me when they first met at a local bar here. I was willing to give her just about everything and not fight or contest the divorce in any way…but now that I know that this had little to do with me (she led me to believe that for 6 weeks) I am having second thoughts. I plan to talk to an attorney to figure out what I should do, but any help or advice on my rights on this would be appreciated. We have two kids and I dont want to hurt them or her…but I also no longer want to give her everything because she could not be honest with me about what was really happening until I found the proof and confronted her with it. Thank you in advance