Alienation of Affection

Alienation of Affection suit can be brought against any person that has alienated the affections of one spouse from the other. The suit would not be against you it would be against the third party (your mother) for alienating your affection for your spouse.

  1. Removing a grandparent from the carpool list is not alienating the child’s affection from that grandparent. Most separation and divorces involve changing the routine in some part. You are not keeping the children from their grandparents.
  2. Talking to a child about the separation or divorce of their parents is not alienating the child’s affection from one parent unless the discussions are one sided. As in telling all the bad stuff about one parent so that the children are afraid or dislike that parent. Children need to talk to someone during this.

I could be wrong, but I do not know that a suit can be brought against one spouse on behalf of a grandparent or that these scenario’s would even change the child’s affections. It’s very difficult to alienate a child from a parent regardless of what the other parent tries to do.
My husband, during his divorce, had voicemails from both his boys telling him that they hated him because his ex let them read the court papers. All they understood was that Daddy is talking bad about mommy. They did not understand that their mother was threatening to take them out of the state. He never actually said anything to them.
My husband has been and still is the primary caregiver. And the oldest has said repeatedly that he wants to live with us full time…we’re still making him wait on a final decision for this until he turns 13. They do not hate him, but children don’t know that feeling of “I love you but I don’t like you right now”. Or “I’m angry at you but that doesn’t mean that I don’t love you”. They know love and hate and there is no inbetween…

I suggest waiting to see if anything comes of this…if your ex chooses to file this, it would be a very expensive suit for him not to win. They may just be trying to get something out of using “scare tactics”.

Have you actually received papers defining the suit? I’d be curious to see how they read. Doesn’t sound like there is a case there at all.

No, he has not filed…just e-mails to my attorney. Also, the carpool reports that the grandmother is using this kind of language.

I have read on this site that this type of thing normally starts out with “threats” from the attorney. It sounds to me as though it’s only “blowing smoke”. What does your attorney have to suggest about this?

Alienation of affection is an action that can be brought against a third party for alienating your affections from your spouse. In-laws can be sued for alienation of affection, but only as it relates to your affections, not those of your children.

You cannot be sued for alienation of affection for allegedly alienating your children’s affections from your spouse or your children’s grandparents.

Even though your mother is a therapist, you may want to consider having an objective professional involved. Having someone neutral will enable you to reinforce the fact that your mother is not doing anything inappropriate.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax

Charlotte Office
301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Phone: (704)307.4600
Main Fax: (704) 9343.0044

Durham & Chapel Hill Office
1829 East Franklin Street
Building 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
(919) 321.0780

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.

Thank you. We did see a child psychologist to discuss this and the psychologist affirmed that my Mother was “comforting the child.”

I wish you the best of luck.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax

Charlotte Office
301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Phone: (704)307.4600
Main Fax: (704) 9343.0044

Durham & Chapel Hill Office
1829 East Franklin Street
Building 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
(919) 321.0780

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.

My husband’s attorney is threatening suing for alienation of affection, but it appears that he is

  1. either going to sue me for alienating the affection of the children from their grandparents (I removed my mother-in-law from the team’s carpool list while still allowing the children to visit her home every weekend for a family brunch) or
  2. sue my mother for talking to my oldest about what is happening (My mother is a therapist and is using age-appropriate play therapy and books to talk with the children).

Normally alienation of affection involves a mistress/affair. Do you know about cases involving the grandparents?