I have discovered on two very old laptops in our home that my brand-new husband (9/14/13) has long internet histories of viewing child porn (everything from “no-nudes” child sites --still very provocatively dressed and posed-- up to things far more graphic). Should I install a key logger on these computers and confront him myself? Is that illegal? Should I simply turn him in to police or local FBI? Can they somehow do surveillance on his internet activities covertly and catch him? I am quite worried to allow myself to be seen by him as “the whistleblower”, as he does have some darker connections to persons he could indeed deploy as ‘muscle’, or so he has told me a number of times. Upon capture/divorce, what would become of shared property such as our home???
I am tremendously ashamed of my foolishness–I have tried so hard to truly know who I came clear across the US to marry, but I have discovered something so dreadful after the fact. Please do offer whatever information you possibly can, and thank you very much.
First, I am not an attorney but this is not a divorce question. Second and most importantly, call the police! If someone is engaged in viewing this garbage there is a good chance thay have or will get hands on with it. Call the police and let them decide how to handle it.
There are a lot of criminal laws that are involved when a party chooses to put a keylogger on a computer. You should read our article on liability under federal and state wiretapping laws for more information before choosing to take such an action.
You have a few options on how to report this & remain safe.
1st option is to call Crime Stoppers & report him . But remember EVERYONE in the house that has access to computer is suspect.
2nd option is to actually go INTO the police dept to talk with police , they will refer you to a detective. They will set everything up & you can remain anonymous, but give them permissions … they will instruct you on that.
3rd option … the key logging is a bad idea, but you can do it… BUT WHO was on the computer? You or him? See the dilemma?
4th option, set up a hidden camera at an angle that captures him & the material he is viewing & turn into the police or Sheriffs dept.
Ask to be placed in protective custody in the event bail is set & possibility someone will bail him out, or have a safe place to go just in case.
**After his arrest, immediately file Bed & Board, testify against him & put his butt in prison.
Also a quick note & observation… You mentioned the laptops were “old”…(are they still being used??)… meaning that it may not have been him or hard to prove it was… anything recent would be key.
He is the only one who accesses/uses those old laptops. The browser histories are what tell me that his viewing is current/recent.
It seems to me that the best option is simply to go directly to the police myself, asking for anonymity/protection. I’ve been racking my poor brain trying to figure out how to keep myself out of the equation in getting this to proper authorities so that he is stopped/caught/put away as I now have learned that revenge is definitely a gear in the workings of his personality. But the pressing nature of all of this has as of late stepped up a[color=#BF0000] BIG [/color]notch . . . he works from home, and a new family with two children (10 and 11) have moved in directly across the street from us just last week.
I can no longer merely ponder and worry. The striking-hot-iron moment has come, and I must act.
I want to thank all who have read and written in response, and also those who’ve offered positive thoughts and prayers.