My live in boyfriend (who is not my sons father) has moved in with me since (Jan '14) after the expiration of a protective order (Nov '13) that my sons father had on me. After all of the uneventful supervised visits during the order, I have since had a 2nd mediation which finally started unsupervised visits (minus over night stays). Upon my & my attorneys request for 1 over night visit/week, he & his attorney advised a 3rd mediation would need to take place. My son is 3 1/2 yrs old & his father had me basically removed from our residence in May '13. My attorney feels we can now proceed with a custody hearing. On the advice of my attorney I continued to see a psychiatrist, which I have since been release from. I have also continued to see my therapist weekly (sometimes less often or phone conferences).
My live in boyfriend (30 yrs old) has multiple breaking & entering charges on his criminal record that date back to his teen years, nothing recent. He also has four DWI charges & will be going to court for his hearing before the end of the year, in which he will be doing time for once convicted.
What questions should I be prepared to answer or circumstantial changes can happen in my custody situation. I’m hoping for joint custody, not just more visitation. My sons father currently has temporary custody of our son since May '13.
What other information or answers would you need to be able to tell me any information you can give me?
Thank you
These questions are best directed at your attorney. Your attorney has full knowledge of the facts surrounding your case and can prepare you for what to expect in your custody action, including what you can expect and what questions you should be prepared to answer.
I understand, but you can’t give me anything?
During a “regular” divorce it’s already very ugly, but here you made that very easy for your ex-husband.
The best would be to keep going on on the right path and start with more visitations (by negotiation), that would be a surprise that a judge give you even share custody with what seems to be a very unstable environment for your child, don’t be greedy and show your ex you can handle a child in your life without screwing up.
It appears that yours is a complicated custody situation and if you have an attorney, that person will be your best source of advice. Your attorney knows all the facts surrounding your case, and you have hired that person to advocate on your behalf. Rather than asking a specific legal question, it sounds like you are wanting some advice as to what to expect during your custody hearing, which I truly can’t advise you on.
That being said, part of the reason why I can’t simply tell you what to expect is that custody is largely discretionary in NC. It is truly up to the judge to decide whether your situation has changed enough to warrant more visitation time with your child. The judge will listen to the testimony on both sides, weigh the credibility of the testimony, and ultimately decide on an order that he or she thinks is in the best interest of the child. While there is a preference in our state for 50/50 custody arrangements, it sounds like your case has mitigating factors that, at least in the past, have warranted your former husband to have more custody. If the judge feels that because circumstances have changed, the child having more time with you is in his best interest, the judge will order such. However, the criminal background of your live-in boyfriend will certainly be an issue that is discussed at the hearing.