Divorce for Adultry & Marriage Counselling

Dear archie:

Greetings. Please hear me about this issue: if you remain in the marriage despite the fact that you know about the affair, you are committing condonment of her behavior. If she keeps committing the same behavior, it will not be condonment though. This issue is only important if you will owe your wife alimony or if she is spending marital funds to participate in the affair.

Which brings me to the real question you need to ask yourself: are you going to forgive her and stay in the marriage or are you going to leave? If you are going to leave, see an attorney. If you are going to forgive her, see a marriage counselor or your clergy. Best of luck.

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney at Law
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

I have proof that my wife has has an affair, as well as proof that she intends to continue her affair at a later date. We just moved to NC from MS in February, and I know that I can’t do anything, legally, until we’ve been residents for 6 months. Last week, my wife mentioned marriage counselling. I asked her to go a few times last year, while we still lived in MS and she refused. She doesn’t know that I have this proof, but she does know that I suspect it.

My question is this: If I agree to marriage counselling, knowing what I know, does that have any impact on my charge of adultry, i.e. alimony, alienation of affection… Would that mean that I’ve ‘forgiven’ her? How about, if we go to counselling, and she still denies the affair, or continues? Thank you.