At this point, I am looking for any and all advice…so might as well post my story here and get some feedback too.
In short, I am married with 2 kids under the age of 7.
4 years ago, my wife had an emotional affair and with some therapy and some work, we stayed together.
3 weeks ago, she admitted to being in the middle of another emotional affair (coworker, not the same person from before)
I started seeing a therapist immediately. She just started seeing one last week. We also did a joint session yesterday.
Of course, I drew a line in the sand and said, either the affair stops, or I am out. In other words, I am not going to examine whats wrong with the marriage as long as you are still cheating. I also said that I was willing to hear her say that she didn’t want to stop cheating. In other words, I wanted HER to make a decision on what SHE really wanted to do.
She seems to have finally stepped up to the plate and made that decision. She is going to end the affair and is will to explore ways to repair the marriage.
So here is where my internal confusion really starts. After all of this, I don’t know if I want to remain married to her. I am willing to do therapy and all of that, but I am tormented by the fact that I don’t know if I have that kind of LOVE for her anymore. I got past the 1st affair. The second one has really hurt me.
Any advice out there? Should I just stay with the therapy and see if the love comes back? I don’t want me (or even her really) to still be in this marriage 5 years from now and not be getting the most out of it. Life is too short for that.